Pro tip: If you plan on mugging someone, don't tell them in advance. (Also don't mug someone, but if you insist, keep your intentions on the down low.)
Scottish lad Gregor Ford was selling a wee golf club when a fellow Scotsman in East Kilbride forgot to switch Messenger windows and gave his game away.
"Awryt mate am goiny meet some geezer for a new putter, wanty come with me and we'll just do him in and take it off him lol," he sent to the "geezer" himself.
Plus, "But its not about you" is NOT as good a save as the would-be swindler thinks it is.
This whole exchange is even funnier when you read it in a Scottish accent. Go full Shrek on this one.