True or false?: masculinity is a prison.
Ding ding ding! Society conditions boys and men to equate masculinity with dominance over others, a lack of vulnerability, and repression of one's emotions. It's no way to live, tbh. Though the discourse around gender roles is gradually changing, men still feel pressured to define themselves by bedding women, earning money, and making other men feel inferior. So when Redditor tokenbisexual asked, "Men of Reddit, what's the most pathetic/ridiculous thing another man has done in attempt to assert his dominance over you?" the answers poured in. Below are sixteen of the most mind-boggling examples.
He tried to drink water faster than me
no one drinks water faster than me
I always feel like the guys who refuse to make room for you when walking by in the other direction are trying to assert their dominance and make themselves feel like hot shit. I never understand why people do that.
Worked as a lifeguard at a summer camp years ago. During safety training we had to do a missing persons search which required all available staff to join hands and walk from the beach to into the water as far as we could while feeling with our feet for the missing swimmer. (During training there was a sandbag we had to find.)
The guy next to me kept insisting on holding mine in a certain way because "*I* will take the upper hand in this situation," said at me while staring me down. Whatever, dude. We're theoretically looking for a drowned child right now.
Flick my man tits.
Literally last weekend some really drunk dude who I had never once met or interacted with tried to fight me (to impress the girls he was with?) It was completely ridiculous, and his way of trying to initiate it was just repeatedly body checking me on the dance floor which I ignored because I thought he was just being drunk and dumb. Turns out one of his friends had to stop him from blindsiding me with a sucker punch to the face (assuming he was able to aim that well)
Some people do not mix well with alcohol apparently
In jr high I remember this one bully that would get on his tip toes and bow out his chest like a gorilla and get all in your face whenever he felt threatened. It was such a funny stereotype maneuver.
I was standing in the breezeway outside a friend's apartment while in college, and a guy coming down the stairs from an upper floor kinda tripped near the bottom of the stairs and stumbled into me. It was clear he super drunk and immediately got aggressive. He was so worked up about being tougher than me for some reason that he started doing push ups at me while me and my friends just laughed.
Fortunately his friends came and apologized and took him back up stairs, but it was definitely the most bizarre assertion of dominance I've ever encountered.
I work in a grocery store and sometimes help unload the delivery trucks and our delivery comes in on what we call cages, like a 6 foot cage on wheels and obviously one that's full of toilet paper will be really light and one filled with 2 litre bottles of juice are the heavy ones. The lift that lowers them from the truck has that patterned metal floor and you have to pull the heavy cages hard to get them off, now Im 5'8" and don't have a lot of weight on me but I can pull these cages off just fine but there's a guy who's like 6'2" and is always trying to show how strong he is, so whenever Im helping and he's there he always insists he gets the heavy cages and that I get the "little guy cages". Everyone agrees he needs to grow up.
One time at a house party, a few of us were talking to some of the girls there and one of the guys randomly started talking about how he does MMA, then another guy joined in and those 2 started wrestling in front of the girls. I don’t think their shirts needed to come off either but what the fuck do I know...
A former coworker. He would just stand in the way and refuse to move. Even if he wasnt in the way he would purposely get in the way. I work in a narrow kitchen so you can imagine how annoying that could be.
At one particular moment I was carrying a bulky 20 lbs box and he decided to do that. I pretended to not see him and barreled into him. He fell over and got incredibly mad at me. Started talking about how I have no muscle. It was pretty funny.
It was a display of the most fragile masculinity I've ever seen.
one guy I know tried to get everyone to whip out their dicks and compare sizes, and honestly it came across as one of the most insecure and childish efforts to assert dominance ever. because dick size has nothing to do with dominance. also this is the guy when we were getting a house insisted "we've all gotta be equals." despite always trying to run things.
I had someone stand on their tippy toes to seem taller when we where talking
This happened over DnD when my friend (who owns a store) let these guys we didn't know that well to join our campaign. I don't know why, I, out of the table got singled out but a girl walks in and this guy:
- complained that I didn't order pizza for him
- said 'how about you go fuck yourself' when I asked him if he wanted some
- walked over behind me and 'playfully' puts his arms around my neck, I told him I'd punch him in the face if he did it one more time because I don't know who the fuck he is.
Absolutely ruined my day.
A friend tried to make himself look good in front of his crush by literally putting me in a random choke hold "for a laugh". Turns out it was because I was talking to her (I had a girlfriend at the time, we were just talking).
It wasn't a choke hold though, it was basically just a headlock, so I decided to correct him. I was fairly oblivious and didn't realise this was a failed "alpha move".
Creeped the shit out of his crush that he would do that out of no-where and she stopped talking to him. Apparently she quite liked him up until that point, so he kinda shot himself in the foot.
Was out having a drink. Started chatting to the guy next to me when I learn he, too, is a musician. He then tells me "you're not a musician. I find it offensive when people tell me they're a musician when they haven't put in the time & dedication that I have." Ok dude come down off your ego trip, christ.
I was leaving a gas station once with a 6 pack of some craft beer to go watch a game at my friends house and a group of college kids were driving out of the parking lot and one yelled out the window, “6 packs are for pussies!” I guess the amount of beer I was planning on drinking that night wasn’t adequate to his standards.