As a wise Whitney Houston once sang, "I believe that children are the future. Teach them well and let them lead the way." Teachers are underappreciated and vastly under-underpaid, but like with every profession, not everyone is good at their job. (Author's note: For example, my job is to do this, and many Facebook commenters will say that it sucks.) In the Reddit thread What's the dumbest teacher you've ever dealt with?, people are sharing tales of the dumbest people whose job was to make them smarter.
1. GrandTheftMordor's friend is rusty on their terms.
My best friend had a science teacher in middle school that gave him zero credit for an answer he gave on an exam. The question was: "What happens to metal when exposed to air for a long period of time?" He answered: "The metal oxidizes with the air which slowly over time destroys the integrity of the metal."
He got zero credit because he didn't use the exact word "rust". -.-
2. mtwstr's Spanish teacher no hablo Espanol.
a spanish teacher we never heard speak spanish, just collect worksheets, hand out new worksheets, occasionally play a tape.
3. Gouwbadgers' teacher doesn't understand the water cycle or the dangers of dehydration.
My teacher thought that water was not regenerated and cleaned. She thought that the clean water that we currently had access to was eventually going to "run out." She would yell at kids that drank too much water, telling them that the earth was going to dry up soon because they were greedy by being thirsty.
4. Picklewhisky's teacher puts Ben Stein in Ferris Bueller's Day Off to shame.
This happened in India so some of the things may not apply in the Western colleges. Even in college, we couldn't walk out of class as we liked. The professor had to permit you to do so
I was about 10 minutes late to class one day. When I entered the classroom, I saw that there was nobody there. Took me about 10 seconds to realize that this was a "mass bunk", i.e., the entire class coordinated with each other and skipped the class. So I took off for the exit but the professor saw me and asked me to go into the class and sit in there, so, I did
Now I was the only person in the class while this guy taught some boring shit for some 40+ minutes. At the end of the class, he wanted to mark attendance. So he pulls out his attendance register and instead of just marking my name as present, he called out every one of the 40 students' names while I just answered "absent" for all of them until my name came around which unfortunately was at the end of the list
TL;DR: Professor called out 40 students' names to mark attendance when there was just one student in the class
5. KingGeezer's teacher won't be making a lot of Tubmans.
A long-term substitute for my 8th Grade English teacher was convinced that the Underground Railroad was a subway network. She gave the kid who corrected her detention.
6. At least Caspercreep scored some Mario Kart off of the scare.
I had a substitute math teacher when I was a freshman in High School that somehow lost his grade book. Instead of telling the principal or anything he just gave everyone an F in that class for the quarter. I got my ass whooped for bringing home my 1 and only F. Thankfully he was fired after the school newsletter went out and I got a Nintendo 64 as an apology from my parents! :D
7. mjlike's teacher had "colourful" methods.
One of my professors used to read essays and see/interpret them as different "colours"... if she didn't like the "colour" of your essay, you failed.
8. TheLaWasHere's mom witnessed the crazy train.
Not me, but my mom. She had a science teacher in high school, who would do a terrible job at explaining things. Then, when he presented the test, he would tell the students that it was "just like gravy."
THEN, as the students were taking the hard exams, the teacher would imitate a train and chug around the room singing, "Choo choo, hop aboard the gravy train!" And anyone who laughed or got distracted by this antic got in trouble.
I'm not making this up.
9. The candle burned out long before Parkraft123's legend ever did.
My English teacher taught us about Princess Diana and Marilyn Monroe, as part of our poetry unit.
She said its fine to teach us about them as part of our poetry unit because "Marilyn Monroe and Princess Diana both had a song written about them".
We had to do a comparitive essay comparing the two versions of Candle in the Wind.
Not only that, but her slideshow presentations were shit.
10. Catsandbowtie's bad teacher was like Cameron Diaz's bad teacher character in Bad Teacher.
I had a math teacher my sophomore year of high school that would have the smartest kids teach the more dumb kids while she sat on her ass texting. She was later fired for drinking on the job.
11. Goestoeleven11's teacher just wanted to support vital public institutions.
I had points taken off a report since I didn't get the book I referenced from a library. My mother who was a teacher at a different high school went there and bitched her out. We complained that she was purposely giving me bad grades due to other issues but they wouldn't let me transfer to a different class.
12. Well, maybe SakuOtaku deserved to be bullied?
In 6th grade, our social studies teacher was the worst.
Some of the things she did: -When talking about immigrants, she said that they usually opened up restaurants. IE: Said that a lot of Chinese immigrants opened up Chinese restaurants, etc (I mean, my Chinese friend's family DOES own a buffet, but that was beside the point)
-While telling us about the values of recycling, she told us that if you throw a banana peel on the ground, it will NEVER go away and decompose.
-She showed a propaganda video that was basically "Global Warming isn't man-caused, it's just the earth naturally going through a cycle!"
-A kid bullied me in home room and said a disgusting comment about me, and I told the teacher, who only nodded and proceeded to talk to ask the kid how he was doing, not even punishing him to my knowledge.
13. PM_ME_UR_CLEAVE's story is #13 on purpose (also, gross username, bro).
I had a teacher afraid of the number 13, wouldn't put them on tests, wouldn't work on the 13th of any month
14. Swagyolo420's teacher secretly worked for Google.
I had a English teacher who literally NEVER answered a question asked by students(cause she's dumb) She always redirects the question to the smartest kid in the class or say "look it up online".
15. Mdcastle's teacher will be missing out on the 2022 FIFA World Cup.
2nd grade teacher thought there was no such country as "Qatar" because "All English words that start with "Q" have a "U" after that.
16. BoltWire's professor had déja vu all over again.
In my college math class we had a teacher that didn't know what the hell he was teaching. literally 0 help when we had questions. constantly contradicting himself.
79% of the class failed the mid term, so they school re-fired him.
Yes. Re-fired. He was fired before for not being a good teacher.
17. RoelOrSomething barely had a teacher or something.
Hoo, boy, where do I begin… Student from México here. I went to a shit public middle school. When I entered 9th grade, the history teacher had just left and the chemistry teacher couldn't teach all four 9th grade classrooms, so we needed a new teacher for two totally different subjects in my class. Introducing: Mrs. Estela. Now, Mrs. Estela was barely a teacher. We seriously have no idea where the principal got her from. So, here go some stories:
She made us print the glosary section of the book on our notebooks.
She said greenhouse effect occurs in winter. (greenhouse effect = efecto invernadero; winter = invierno). You could easily tell she was just making shit up.
We had a class starting by drawing some lines in our notebooks. When we were done… well, that was it. She just made us draw lines. What the fuck, lady?
She tried to draw all the different lab instruments on the whiteboard and failed miserably. I swear to God, all of them looked like penises. 14-year-old me couldn't stop laughing. 17-year-old me still does.
The other chemistry teacher had to explain the lab activity (we don't wanna give the chlorhydric acid flask to the crazy lady). He kept her as far as he could from everything the whole class.
We all unanimously decided to fire her. Students, teachers, the principal. I can't believe she lasted for more than two weeks. I wish I could say I feel bad for her. But I would be lying.