In an utterly perfect example of why drinking and emailing is a bad idea, this guy sent an email to his professor while he (the student, not the professor) was wasted off his ass, asking for an extension on a paper. It went better than I would have expected, honestly.
The drunk student wrote to his professor, basically asking for an extension on a paper. This is how he chose to phrase that request:
Just letting u kno that u r a motherfuckn g and I'm sorry u r bald. Lol
If u want I can hook u go with a girl who can get ur hair back and keep you bangin.
Also I just needed to ask u for an extension on my paper. I'm really fucked rn and will b sick af tomorrow.
Keep slayin boi and I forgot to do school loop again
Love u and c u Monday
Good fuckn yard