School

<p>Sure, the &quot;miracle of life&quot; is impressive or whatever. But given the state of sex education in this country, the real miracle is that anyone manages to figure out how sex works, let alone how to practice safe sex and use birth control.</p><h2>Someone <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jt5ou8/what_is_your_sexed_horror_story/" target="_blank">asked</a> Reddit: &quot;What is your sex-ed horror story?&quot; These 26 people share stories of the funniest and most horrifying moments from their sex ed class:</h2><p>1.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/mcharrislennstarr/">mcharrislennstarr</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Not horrible, but we were supposed to play a health Jeopardy game but the teacher accidentally chose a sex positions one.</p> </blockquote><p>2.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/TheDeadlySquid/">TheDeadlySquid</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Split us up into boys and girls with the girls going off into another room for instruction. Then two teachers screamed at us for what must have been 20 minutes that if anyone laughed or made a joke we would be suspended. Nice intro, thanks!</p> </blockquote><p>3.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Beatleborg22/">Beatleborg22</a>:</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>There was a kid in class who raised his hand and asked, &quot;whats it called when girls spray out that liquid during sex?&quot; The teacher responded &quot;girls don&#39;t do that.&quot; He said &quot; trust me its real, I&#39;ve seen it a bunch of times in videos&quot; She never responded. That was 6th grade.</p> </blockquote><p>4.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/ThetrueBILLCIPHER/">ThetrueBILLCIPHER</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>A teacher asked the class, &quot;who can name a part of the male reproductive anatomy?&quot; And this one kind answered with full confidence...&quot;a vagina!&quot;</p> </blockquote><p>5.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/_saidwhatIsaid/">_saidwhatIsaid</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>In 6th grade, I had honest-to-god never heard the word &quot;masturbate&quot; before in my life. The teacher was explaining stuff or maybe it was a video about safe sex or abstinence (I can&#39;t recall which), but the word came up and nothing explained what it meant. I asked &quot;what is masturbation?&quot; and an awkward silence fell over everything, maybe because the teacher (a man) thought I was joking or trying to be funny.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>He slowly realized I was serious and then struggled so hard to explain it appropriately: &quot;It&#39;s when, you know... you do things to feel good with yourself, you touch things or--&quot; and I felt terrible for asking. To this day, I don&#39;t know who was more embarrassed: me, the teacher, or everyone else.<button></button></p> </blockquote><p>6.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/amideadyet1357/">amideadyet1357</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Well, I didn&rsquo;t think it was a horror story, but it&rsquo;s stunned a few people.</p> <p>When I was five and my sister was six we had a fish tank, one of the fish we had was a pregnant mollie we liked quite a bit. Unfortunately she died before giving birth. So my sister, curious creature she is, asked our aunt (a trauma nurse who worked on life flight with a passion for teaching) if we could cut open the fish and save the babies. This would eventually lead first to my aunt dissecting the fish for us then to her explaining reproduction and ended with a rudimentary version of the talk.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>My aunt would take every chance she got to have a very graphic and factual discussion about sex and reproduction so we would always be armed with knowledge and never have anything unknown. But it was in hindsight a bizarre way to get educated on the birds and the bees.</p> </blockquote><p>7.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/RichmondTransplant/">RichmondTransplant</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>One kid in my class asked if you could get STDs from having sex with a chicken. Kind of put him on the spot and was a little suspicious...</p> </blockquote><p>8.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/btldlrge/">btldlrge</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Student in fifth grade asked at what age males grow a penis</p> </blockquote><p>9.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Marvel089/">Marvel089</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>9th grade sex ed: teacher got a wooden penis to show how to put on a condom and the condom ripped in front of everyone. And our teacher said, &quot;In my 27 years of living, I have never seen a condom rip&quot; and someone in the back of class said, &quot;Damn, teacher be getting hella bitches&quot; and he legit laughed nervously</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>10.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/capbuddy5/">capbuddy5</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Not really a horror story- in high school sex ed our teacher had a big section on condoms which culminated with the class betting on how stretchy they were to prove that no one should accept the &quot;I&#39;m too big for them&quot; excuse. Well one air pump and one condom later we had our answer at about the size of a long watermelon. As our teacher was going to try to pop it (to prove they tough) our principle was doing his rounds and opened the door, saw our teacher smacking the shit out of an inflated condom and just backed away slowly. I found it hilarious.</p> </blockquote><p>11.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/cattea74/">cattea74</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Probably 9 or 10 years old. Mid 1980s. Sex ed was taught at an after school event that lasted about a week. My mom and I and my best friend and her mom went. There were two rooms, girls and their moms in one room and boys and their dads in the next room over. We learned basic stuff mostly about anatomy. Slides were shown. Probably dating from the 1950s. Awkward.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Then at one point, the male teacher came over and asked for a few of the moms to come next door to help with something. My imagination went wild, especially since my mom went with the man. I thought for sure that she and the other mom who went were being forced to show a live demo of what their boobs looked like or &#39;worse&#39; even though I didn&#39;t know what &#39;worse&#39; was yet. They were in there for what seemed forever. What were they doing to our moms! How is my mom going to explain this to my dad when we get home? Why is nobody alarmed? Because...They were moving desks.</p> </blockquote><p>12.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Tugboatdriver/">Tugboatdriver</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>In my school sex ed was co-ed until gender specific issues came up. So when it came time to learn how to self check for cancers we split into groups. When we were sent away to watch a film on testicular cancer, I said, &quot;alright fellas let&#39;s watch the ball game!&quot; And got detention. I still think it was a Grade A joke.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>13.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/AGiantForeskin/">AGiantForeskin</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>This isn&#39;t too much of a horror story but more of a moment that made me queasy. First, when discussing testicular cancer, they showed us a video of this skinny ginger guy in the shower feeling up his balls to check for tumors. Then they gave us this fake nutsack to pass around and feel. it was pretty life-like and you could squeeze the balls and they&#39;d kind of pop/slide around the sack. All I could think of was doing that to my own sack and it just made me feel uneasy. the whole experience was just awful.</p> </blockquote><p>14.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/SpitefulBadger/">SpitefulBadger</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>We played STD-in-a-cup</p> <p>Everyone gets a cup of water, one cup of water has a bunch of dissolved starch in it (the &ldquo;std&rdquo;). We went around swapping fluids to represent sex, and we&rsquo;re supposed to see if we could safely avoid stds without protection (swapping fluids). At the end, we find out who had the STD by dropping iodine into each cup, turning the starch blue. If it turned blue, you tested positive.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Everyone in the class ended up with the STD, even me, because even though I only had one partner, and they had only had one before me, the one before them was a sloot and had everybodies fluids. Honestly, a very good exercise and warning.</p> <p>Except for that one kid. At the end, he dumped his test results and refilled his cup at the bubbler in order to claim he didn&rsquo;t have the std, and he was good for more fluid swapping...</p> <p>Honestly, another good lesson on assholes who will lie about being clean. Use protection, kids.</p> </blockquote><p>15.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Special_Custard6015/">Special_Custard6015</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>My friend&#39;s mom bought a Sexual Reproductive pop-up book. It covered both male and female. So you would open it up and the uterus and fallopian tubes would pop up at your face.</p> <p>You can only imagine the fun we had with that.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>16.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/bigbabyxrey/">bigbabyxrey</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>My health teacher in high school told us &quot;condoms are strong and they are <em>very</em> stretchy. Don&#39;t believe any guy who goes &quot;I&#39;m too big, it won&#39;t fit <em>all this</em>&quot; or &quot;it&#39;s just gonna break anyways, why bother putting one on.&quot; She then produced three condoms available for pickup in the health office, proceeded to pull one over her hand and up past her elbow on her arm like it was a fancy costume glove, spread her fingers out as wide as they can go, stretch two remaining of said condoms over her cowboy boots, and walked around non-stop for over six hours before one of them broke. That shit will haunt my dreams forever lmao.</p> </blockquote><p>17.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/aliveinjoburg2/">aliveinjoburg2</a>:</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>My sex ed teacher brought a kid up to the front of the classroom wearing a shirt that had too long sleeves and explained what an uncircumcised penis looked like.</p> </blockquote><p>18.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/artemis1860/">artemis1860</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>More of a lack of sex-Ed horror story (and thankfully short).</p> <p>A guy who I had a crush on, both of us seniors, pulled me aside one day and asks... &ldquo;so when a girl has her period she just lays an egg in the toilet right?&rdquo;</p> <p>I&rsquo;ll be honest. I&rsquo;m not sure if I answered him or just stared at him.</p> </blockquote><p>19.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/livydiv/">livydiv</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>My moms the sex ed teacher. No context needed</p> </blockquote><p>20.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/A40/">A40</a>:</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>It was taught by a Jesuit monk whose English language skills were &quot;Latin&quot; and by the end (one one-hour class - total) I sometimes couldn&#39;t even identify which sex the diagrams were showing. (It was <em>all</em> line diagrams. <em>All</em> medical terms.)</p> <p>Father Bertoli thought it went well, anyway.</p> </blockquote><p>21.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Icy9kills/">Icy9kills</a>:<button></button></p><blockquote> <p>In 6th grade I learned the term &ldquo;popping your cherry&rdquo; from some friends in sex Ed class. I went home with this newly found knowledge and accused my older sister of having her cherry popped. She broke out in tears and my mom grounded me for a week.</p> </blockquote><p>22.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Exandrus/">Exandrus</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>9th grade health with Mr. Lamb. Dude was an absolute gem of a human being, but his voice sounded exactly like Barry White. Like all the time. So any time he tried to say anything remotely sexual, it sounded like the voiceover for a raunchy R&amp;B song. Which made the freshmen erupt in laughter. Constantly. Poor guy just couldn&#39;t get through a lesson for three straight weeks.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>23.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/RockMoss/">RockMoss</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>A horror story in terms of education. In grade 9, we were given a paper that had an &quot;equation&quot; that said having safe, protected sex was equal to Satan. It went:</p> <p>Condoms and birth control lead to premarital sex and sex without the intention of procreation.</p> <p>Premarital sex and sex without the intent to have children is a sin.</p> <p>Choosing to be sinful is the job of Satan.</p> <p>Condoms=Satan</p> <p>Needless to say we had a lot of pregnant girls in our graduating year.</p> </blockquote><p>24.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/theritter/">theritter</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>The only thing I remember from sex-Ed which was taught by the creepy lunch lady.</p> <p>Lunch lady unrolls a condom and stretches it as far as she could. Then she says &ldquo;I know none of you are this big, so this will fit any of you. &ldquo;</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>25.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/fireflyfly3/">fireflyfly3</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Catholic middle school. In eighth grade they made us watch a video that was basically &ldquo;don&rsquo;t have sex or you&rsquo;ll die&rdquo;. The woman speaking in the video literally said she could tell if a girl has had sex or not by looking into her eyes and gazing into her spirit.</p> <p>Aside from basic biology and anatomy, that was the only formal sex ed that I received in school. That&rsquo;s horrifying.<button></button></p> </blockquote><p>26.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Jonnywalk/">Jonnywalk</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Not really a horror story, rather a hilarious one.</p> <p>Catholic school sex-ed and they break up girls and guys into two rooms. A nun teaching the girls and a priest teaching the boys. Honestly probably more informative then my friends who went to public school, taught about abstinence as well as condoms and what not.</p> <p>Anyways the priest talks to us about masturbation and I&rsquo;ll never forget his line. &ldquo;Masturbation is perfectly normal. In fact 95% of men admit to doing it one time or the other. The other 5% are liars.&rdquo;</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

26 people share their funniest and most horrifying stories from sex ed class.

Sure, the &quot;miracle of life&quot; is impressive or whatever. But given the state of sex education in this country, the real miracle is that anyone manages to figure out how sex works, let alone how to practice safe sex and use birth control.Someone asked Reddit: &quot;What is your sex-ed horror story?&quot; These 26 people share stories of the funniest and most horrifying moments from their sex ed class:1.) From mcharrislennstarr: Not horrible, but we were supposed to play a health Jeopardy game but the teacher accidentally chose a sex positions one. 2.) From TheDeadlySquid: Split us up into boys and girls with the girls going off into another room for instruction. Then two teachers screamed at us for what must have been 20 minutes that if anyone laughed or made a joke we would be suspended. Nice intro, thanks! 3.) From Beatleborg22: There was a kid in class who raised his hand and asked, &quot;whats it called when girls spray out that liquid during sex?&quot; The teacher responded &quot;girls don&#39;t do that.&quot; He said &quot; trust me its real, I&#39;ve seen it a bunch of times in videos&quot; She never responded. That was 6th grade. 4.) From ThetrueBILLCIPHER: A teacher asked the class, &quot;who can name a part of the male reproductive anatomy?&quot; And this one kind answered with full confidence...&quot;a vagina!&quot; 5.) From _saidwhatIsaid: In 6th grade, I had honest-to-god never heard the word &quot;masturbate&quot; before in my life. The teacher was explaining stuff or maybe it was a video about safe sex or abstinence (I can&#39;t recall which), but the word came up and nothing explained what it meant. I asked &quot;what is masturbation?&quot; and an awkward silence fell over everything, maybe because the teacher (a man) thought I was joking or trying to be funny.  He slowly realized I was serious and then struggled so hard to explain it appropriately: &quot;It&#39;s when, you know... you do things to feel good with yourself, you touch things or--&quot; and I felt terrible for asking. To this day, I don&#39;t know who was more embarrassed: me, the teacher, or everyone else. 6.) From amideadyet1357: Well, I didn&rsquo;t think it was a horror story, but it&rsquo;s stunned a few people. When I was five and my sister was six we had a fish tank, one of the fish we had was a pregnant mollie we liked quite a bit. Unfortunately she died before giving birth. So my sister, curious creature she is, asked our aunt (a trauma nurse who worked on life flight with a passion for teaching) if we could cut open the fish and save the babies. This would eventually lead first to my aunt dissecting the fish for us then to her explaining reproduction and ended with a rudimentary version of the talk.  My aunt would take every chance she got to have a very graphic and factual discussion about sex and reproduction so we would always be armed with knowledge and never have anything unknown. But it was in hindsight a bizarre way to get educated on the birds and the bees. 7.) From RichmondTransplant: One kid in my class asked if you could get STDs from having sex with a chicken. Kind of put him on the spot and was a little suspicious... 8.) From btldlrge: Student in fifth grade asked at what age males grow a penis 9.) From Marvel089: 9th grade sex ed: teacher got a wooden penis to show how to put on a condom and the condom ripped in front of everyone. And our teacher said, &quot;In my 27 years of living, I have never seen a condom rip&quot; and someone in the back of class said, &quot;Damn, teacher be getting hella bitches&quot; and he legit laughed nervously 10.) From capbuddy5: Not really a horror story- in high school sex ed our teacher had a big section on condoms which culminated with the class betting on how stretchy they were to prove that no one should accept the &quot;I&#39;m too big for them&quot; excuse. Well one air pump and one condom later we had our answer at about the size of a long watermelon. As our teacher was going to try to pop it (to prove they tough) our principle was doing his rounds and opened the door, saw our teacher smacking the shit out of an inflated condom and just backed away slowly. I found it hilarious. 11.) From cattea74: Probably 9 or 10 years old. Mid 1980s. Sex ed was taught at an after school event that lasted about a week. My mom and I and my best friend and her mom went. There were two rooms, girls and their moms in one room and boys and their dads in the next room over. We learned basic stuff mostly about anatomy. Slides were shown. Probably dating from the 1950s. Awkward.  Then at one point, the male teacher came over and asked for a few of the moms to come next door to help with something. My imagination went wild, especially since my mom went with the man. I thought for sure that she and the other mom who went were being forced to show a live demo of what their boobs looked like or &#39;worse&#39; even though I didn&#39;t know what &#39;worse&#39; was yet. They were in there for what seemed forever. What were they doing to our moms! How is my mom going to explain this to my dad when we get home? Why is nobody alarmed? Because...They were moving desks. 12.) From Tugboatdriver: In my school sex ed was co-ed until gender specific issues came up. So when it came time to learn how to self check for cancers we split into groups. When we were sent away to watch a film on testicular cancer, I said, &quot;alright fellas let&#39;s watch the ball game!&quot; And got detention. I still think it was a Grade A joke. 13.) From AGiantForeskin: This isn&#39;t too much of a horror story but more of a moment that made me queasy. First, when discussing testicular cancer, they showed us a video of this skinny ginger guy in the shower feeling up his balls to check for tumors. Then they gave us this fake nutsack to pass around and feel. it was pretty life-like and you could squeeze the balls and they&#39;d kind of pop/slide around the sack. All I could think of was doing that to my own sack and it just made me feel uneasy. the whole experience was just awful. 14.) From SpitefulBadger: We played STD-in-a-cup Everyone gets a cup of water, one cup of water has a bunch of dissolved starch in it (the &ldquo;std&rdquo;). We went around swapping fluids to represent sex, and we&rsquo;re supposed to see if we could safely avoid stds without protection (swapping fluids). At the end, we find out who had the STD by dropping iodine into each cup, turning the starch blue. If it turned blue, you tested positive.  Everyone in the class ended up with the STD, even me, because even though I only had one partner, and they had only had one before me, the one before them was a sloot and had everybodies fluids. Honestly, a very good exercise and warning. Except for that one kid. At the end, he dumped his test results and refilled his cup at the bubbler in order to claim he didn&rsquo;t have the std, and he was good for more fluid swapping... Honestly, another good lesson on assholes who will lie about being clean. Use protection, kids. 15.) From Special_Custard6015: My friend&#39;s mom bought a Sexual Reproductive pop-up book. It covered both male and female. So you would open it up and the uterus and fallopian tubes would pop up at your face. You can only imagine the fun we had with that. 16.) From bigbabyxrey: My health teacher in high school told us &quot;condoms are strong and they are very stretchy. Don&#39;t believe any guy who goes &quot;I&#39;m too big, it won&#39;t fit all this&quot; or &quot;it&#39;s just gonna break anyways, why bother putting one on.&quot; She then produced three condoms available for pickup in the health office, proceeded to pull one over her hand and up past her elbow on her arm like it was a fancy costume glove, spread her fingers out as wide as they can go, stretch two remaining of said condoms over her cowboy boots, and walked around non-stop for over six hours before one of them broke. That shit will haunt my dreams forever lmao. 17.) From aliveinjoburg2: My sex ed teacher brought a kid up to the front of the classroom wearing a shirt that had too long sleeves and explained what an uncircumcised penis looked like. 18.) From artemis1860: More of a lack of sex-Ed horror story (and thankfully short). A guy who I had a crush on, both of us seniors, pulled me aside one day and asks... &ldquo;so when a girl has her period she just lays an egg in the toilet right?&rdquo; I&rsquo;ll be honest. I&rsquo;m not sure if I answered him or just stared at him. 19.) From livydiv: My moms the sex ed teacher. No context needed 20.) From A40: It was taught by a Jesuit monk whose English language skills were &quot;Latin&quot; and by the end (one one-hour class - total) I sometimes couldn&#39;t even identify which sex the diagrams were showing. (It was all line diagrams. All medical terms.) Father Bertoli thought it went well, anyway. 21.) From Icy9kills: In 6th grade I learned the term &ldquo;popping your cherry&rdquo; from some friends in sex Ed class. I went home with this newly found knowledge and accused my older sister of having her cherry popped. She broke out in tears and my mom grounded me for a week. 22.) From Exandrus: 9th grade health with Mr. Lamb. Dude was an absolute gem of a human being, but his voice sounded exactly like Barry White. Like all the time. So any time he tried to say anything remotely sexual, it sounded like the voiceover for a raunchy R&amp;B song. Which made the freshmen erupt in laughter. Constantly. Poor guy just couldn&#39;t get through a lesson for three straight weeks. 23.) From RockMoss: A horror story in terms of education. In grade 9, we were given a paper that had an &quot;equation&quot; that said having safe, protected sex was equal to Satan. It went: Condoms and birth control lead to premarital sex and sex without the intention of procreation. Premarital sex and sex without the intent to have children is a sin. Choosing to be sinful is the job of Satan. Condoms=Satan Needless to say we had a lot of pregnant girls in our graduating year. 24.) From theritter: The only thing I remember from sex-Ed which was taught by the creepy lunch lady. Lunch lady unrolls a condom and stretches it as far as she could. Then she says &ldquo;I know none of you are this big, so this will fit any of you. &ldquo; 25.) From fireflyfly3: Catholic middle school. In eighth grade they made us watch a video that was basically &ldquo;don&rsquo;t have sex or you&rsquo;ll die&rdquo;. The woman speaking in the video literally said she could tell if a girl has had sex or not by looking into her eyes and gazing into her spirit. Aside from basic biology and anatomy, that was the only formal sex ed that I received in school. That&rsquo;s horrifying. 26.) From Jonnywalk: Not really a horror story, rather a hilarious one. Catholic school sex-ed and they break up girls and guys into two rooms. A nun teaching the girls and a priest teaching the boys. Honestly probably more informative then my friends who went to public school, taught about abstinence as well as condoms and what not. Anyways the priest talks to us about masturbation and I&rsquo;ll never forget his line. &ldquo;Masturbation is perfectly normal. In fact 95% of men admit to doing it one time or the other. The other 5% are liars.&rdquo; 

Sure, the &quot;miracle of life&quot; is impressive or whatever. But given the state of sex education in this country, the real miracle is that anyone manages to figure out how sex works, let alone how to practice safe sex and use birth...