5. The Queen. Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II had an adorable British tummy ache this weekend that even a good, old-fashioned hot water bottle couldn't cure. It was such a buttoned-up, traditional case of gastroenteritis that it required the queen be taken to hospital, where her diet was no doubt restricted to scones with clotted cream and a spot of tea. We like to imagine she kept her charming self entertained by re-reading The Secret Garden, and that visitors included a shirtless Colin Firth, the entire cast of Downton Abbey, and whichever wizards from Harry Potter could make it.