If you want to hear the dumbest things ever, just work in customer service. Obviously not all the inner-workings of a company are self-explanatory, but after reading these dumb questions posted to reddit, it's pretty clear that whoever said "there's no such thing as a dumb question" must have been pretty dumb.

1. RepletesMaryJane had a hotel customer who didn't know what doors were.

I work at a hotel and I had a guest/customer call and inform me that his room did not have a bathroom and that he would need to be moved to one which did. I informed him of course that all of our rooms have bathrooms, and asked if he had checked the doors in the room. He had not..


2. And rggrd's guest was ready to believe the bedroom had no bed.

I work at a hotel, a client walks in: "If I book a room, does it include the bed?" Like no Sir, we only provide you a chair so you can sit down and wait till check out time.

3. ​Baldulf had a bookstore customer who was illiterate to how bookstores work.

-Can you photoshop some pictures for me?

-Sir, this is a bookstore.

-Yeah, but I see you have a computer right here.

4. trebuchetfight had to go through a full Abbot and Costello routine.

I work at an Italian place right now. We call our Italian menu items by Italian names with English descriptions. I get a lot of questions, but I don't mind a hair because I get paid to talk about food.

Not too long ago though it sort of went slapstick. They kept asking it. "Pollo e penne?" "Oh, that's chicken and pasta with..." "Does it have meat in it?" "The chicken pasta? Yes, pollo is Italian for chicken." "Can I get the chicken but not the pollo?" "Pollo is just Italian for chicken, if you want chicken it's really good..." "No, I like chicken but I don't want pollo." I kind of lost it for a split second.


5. ParrotChild had a gift shop customer that didn't grasp the concept of what a room was.

"Does this room go all the way to the back wall over there?"

She pointed a finger out towards the end of the shop-floor, past all the shelves and merchandise.

"That white wall? The one furthest away at the end of the room? Yes."

"That is part of the room too?"

"Yes, this room contains all of itself."

"Thank you."

".... what the fuck just happened?"

6. NoDoThis had a customer who was pissed they weren't at starbucks.

Working at a small coffee shop that roasted their own beans/had their own brand. "Do you sell Starbucks here?" "No ma'am we roast our own coffee." "Well that's just bad business!" ... okay.


7. And darcendale was a starbucks employee who had a customer who was pissed they weren't mcdonalds.

I used to work at Starbucks. And I don't know how many times people would come through and order egg McMuffins, McGriddles, hash browns, basically anything on a McDonalds menu. And you'd say "oh I'm sorry this isn't McDonalds we don't have those" and they'd freak out and yell "YOU DONT SELL MCMUFFINS?!?!?!"

8. ​SenorBeef 6133 points

Gas station.

"Hey, the bathroom door is locked. Can I get a key?"

"There's no key, if it's locked there's someone in there"

"How does it know?"

"How does... what... know... what?"

"How does the bathroom know someone is in there?"

"People.... people go in and then they lock the door while they're using it."

[5 second pause]


This was a 20-25 year old guy who wasn't obviously intoxicated.


9. ​Proxy12345 had a customer ho needed help wiping.

Customer screaming: "MY NEW CAR'S BACK WIPER DOESN'T WORK!!!"

we walk outside, look at back window

Me: you don't have a back wiper blade.

10. This person thought ​Bayarearedneck had x-ray vision.

As a UPS driver

Customer: what's in the package?

Me: no idea you ordered it

11. ​RichardStrauss123 had to explain how lawns work.

Ran a lawn mowing service. New customer asks about the process.

"Do you come to my house to mow it?"

No. We pick it up and haul it to our special mowing center then bring it back.


12. ​Arii797ros's customer wasnt just dumb, she was evil.

I'm a cashier at a grocery store and one time I had a lady ask me of I could "tell everyone else to let her go first." Like, she expected me to force everyone who had been patiently waiting in line to let her cut them. It wasn't like she only had 1 or 2 items either; her cart was packed.

13. ​DeniseDeNephew overhead something you just can't unhear.

I went to dinner once at a Chinese restaurant in Missouri and a woman at the table next to ours yelled at the waiter, "Where is the other sauce? We are supposed to get Sweet and Sour Sauce and we only got one sauce!"


14. And finally, a story from PM_ME_CRAFT_BEER so stupid, it cannot be explained.

Worked on a Christmas tree farm over winter break in college. One time I had a lady ask me, "so, what are these trees made out of?"