5. Mitt Romney - "Mitt who?" you ask. Exactly. It's been only two weeks since the election and Mitt "Sour Grapes" Romney is already vanishing into obscurity faster than the Gangnam Style guy, and with considerably less rhythm. Romney's most recent attempt to stay relevant fell flat when he whined that Obama won the election by giving "gifts" to minority groups — comments that now have his former Republican friends distancing themselves from him like rats fleeing a sinking 300-foot yacht. Time for Mitt to read our new book, They're Just Not That Into You And Never Were Because Frankly You Were An Extremely Lackluster Candidate.

Sources: Chase Mitchell