5. The New York Knicks - The Knicks' offseason is starting to look as depressing as most Knicks seasons. On one end, once-hot Jeremy Lin is asking for an astronomical $25 million to stay on the team despite being the basketball equivalent of pogs, while on the other, newly signed point guard Jason Kidd celebrated his 3,000th year in the NBA by wrapping his car around a telephone pole. On the bright side, we will graciously step in to buy a deeply discounted Jeremy Lin jersey and take his place for the bargain price of $24 million.