Your waiters are eavesdropping on you and these 17 stories prove it.

Your waiters are eavesdropping on you and these 17 stories prove it.
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It's pretty normal to go out to a restaurant to break big, bad news to somebody—and yet no matter how soft you think you're talking, somebody is going to hear you, particularly the person whose job it is to bring you food and drinks.

In fact, getting to hear all those juicy secrets and awkward conversations is actually a perk of the job. And luckily for you, some of those waiters and waitresses decided to take to Reddit to share some of the best stories they've ever overheard.

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1. This story from dougie0341 could only have been worse if the guy had been in love with his own sister.

"Me and your sister are in love and I want a divorce"

2. Hey, N3KO_MURF, what happens in the 1940s, stays in the 1940s.

An elderly couple sat down at a table in my section once, and the husband obviously had some severe health issues (Oxygen tank, and a nurse with him) so I guess he decided to confess to an affair during WW2 with one of the nurses in Germany, the wife was a little teary eyed at first, but forgave the guy saying "we've been married almost 75 years, you think I'm gonna let the past ruin it all now?"

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3. And that's when supersnaps had to cancel the order of sushi and soft cheese.

Two adults and two teenagers, woman and girl on one side of the table, man and boy on the other. I just assume it's a normal family out for dinner. Walk up after some time to take their order and they are all deep in conversation. Turns out they're not related, yet. They are all discussing what to do about the boy getting the girl pregnant.

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4. Once Askani heard "Plan B" a beeline was made.

Walked up to a couple figuring out where they could get Plan B. I realized that and tried to do a sharp turn to a different table. It seemed like a personal moment but they notice me make my b-line, I think, because they were really seemed embarrassed the rest of the meal. I definitely could have done it smoother.

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5. Cool, fun_shirt got to be what's known as an "enabler."

I was bringing a man his third martini, at lunch, as his companion confronted him about alcoholism.

6. This story from Numberlesss reads less like a tale of eavesdropping and more like a deposition.

Once was delivering drinks to two ladies and I caught, "I hate that bitch so much. I would fuck her boyfriend just to piss her off. I don't care if I get an STD.".

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7. MasterPip heard a bemusing tale of manslaughter.

"Ran him over and left the body there"

Was the conversation I walked in on. It was a married couple. Late forties or early fifties. If it had been in regards to some sort of story I don't think they would have that "Oh shit did he hear that?" expression on their faces.

8. And unfortunately _Jack_of_spades didn't work at a place that gave out free ice cream sundaes to the recently non-virginated.

I had a table that consisted of a young teenage boy, his parents, and his girlfriend. I'm not sure how THEY got to this point in the conversation, but it came up somewhere between ordering their food and the food being ready that the boy and the girl weren't virgins anymore. The table was a mess of emotions for the rest of the night. The fury of the father, the disappointment of the mother, the defiance of the son, and the mortification of the girlfriend. I'm not sure why they didn't leave immediately to sort it all out at home but they stayed the whole meal and made things awkward for everyone.

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9. MADBOWLofSOUP and coworkers really aren't the ones who ought to be embarrassed here.

We had a regular who brought dates to the restaurant all the time. We thought he was single until he brought his wife in and one of the servers said "who is this one?" right in front of the wife. I couldn't believe my ears at the rude question alone, but the wife's facial expression made it clear she picked up on it and when the husband introduced her as his wife I immediately had to get out of that awkward situation. Thank god it wasn't my table.

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10. Yes, psychoplatapus, they did need another minute. And some shots.

Once I walked up to a guy telling his girlfriend that he has Syphilis. I heard that and immediately turned around because I felt they needed another minute....

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11. A cheeseburger with or without tears on it still tastes good, Alfredsbutler.

when i was a busboy before i started serving tables, i went to drop off food to a middle aged married couple, right when i dropped the food he served her divorce papers saying to sign the divorce right now, The next hour consisted of her sitting there quietly sobbing into a cheeseburger.

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12. User madafaku did the right thing.

3 top of middle aged men in suits.

Me- hey , welcome to tgimcchilibees, you guys doing okay tonight?

Customer- Not really, we just found out our brother died.

Me- Shit man, here's the drink menu.

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13. Illegaltuna didn't have a prayer.

I walked up during what looked like a lull in conversation between a young couple, but the girl launched into prayer instead, asking for help in keeping her guy away from "the temptations of the flesh" and such. As she went on, eyes closed, the guy looked up at me and shrugged. I never found out what it was all about specifically, but he obviously wasn't taking it seriously while it was a dire situation for her. They'd only gotten drinks by the time she obviously broke up with him. It was so awkward to ask whether they wanted to order... Or just wanted the check.

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14. Malico1997 is still trying to get their orders.

Walked over to basically an intervention where the family was yelling at the dad to stop writing prescriptions to people who didn't need them because he was going to be caught. He was in denial, they gave no fucks I was standing right there.

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15. AccidentalDystmesis met the villain from an 80s primetime soap, it would seem. Dynasty, something like that.

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"I really can't wait for my mother to just die. She would never let us sell the hotel, but as soon as she's gone I'm getting out of this business. I can't wait to have all that money." Then they all laughed.

16. No, LeVampirate, that is one. That one totally counts. It's a good one.

I can't really think of any, but I do remember hearing a guy yell at a girl "At least my eyebrows are real!"

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17. Because, BohemianBarbie, if the lady says no, you can propose to the mozzarella sticks.

I walked up to a table, that wasn't mine, to drop off an appetizer:

Me: "Hello, here's your mozzarella.......

Guy: proposing to girlfriend

Me: "........sticks." (Turns and runs away)

Why? Why would you propose in a shitty, cheap, restaurant where the servers wear jeans and tshirts, and you throw peanut shells on the floor? I am forever a part of their engagement story.

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