"AITA for abandoning two 'helpless' women in the wilderness?"
It sounds bad, but the details matter. This happened in September but came up in a conversation with friends yesterday. They were divided on whether I'd done something unethical.
I, mid-30s M, work for my USA state's park system (big forests and wilderness areas type parks, that is). I spend most of my time outdoors and do a ton of hiking.
The day this happened I was finishing up a long, challenging hike on my day off at a nearby large wildlife refuge that is privately owned (i.e., not a state park/my place of employment, though I know everyone who works there).
The refuge has a trail system with four trails of differing difficulties and lengths, from blue (wide, easy, about 2.5 miles) to red (difficult, 16.5 miles). All trails loop and share the same start/end. So a person like me doing red will spend some time on the trails with those doing the other ones.
I was in the last mile or so before the parking lot and was pretty bushed from the long trail. I heard really loud screaming/moaning up ahead and ran to see what was happening. I came upon two women, who I'd learn were mother and daughter (hard to tell ages, I'm guessing 50s and 30s, not elderly). Both, especially the mother were heavy-set (this may matter). The mother was the one wailing as she sat on a rock.
I was concerned (she's shrieking in a forest, after all). I learned that, oh yes, she's "horribly" injured. In the mile and a half they'd done on blue, she had developed a blister. Don't get me wrong, blisters hurt, I know very well. But I truly thought she was hurt when I heard her. I didn't say anything negative.
I have a nicely stocked med kit in my pack, with all sorts of options for blisters, so I offered her whatever she likes. She took her shoe off and stuck her leg at me, clearly indicating that I'm to treat the blister. Yeah, no. Not happening. No strange lady feet in the forest for me.
I politely refused and again offered her the med kit. Mother starts moaning and crying. Daughter speaks up for the first time, something along the lines of "just do it." I refused again and put some blister bandages on the rock. I made to move on, and mother demanded water, very rudely.
Yeah, no, I have a hydration pack. She isn't putting her mouth on my bite valve. I'm now fully over helping these people.
I made to leave ("well, you're almost to the trail end, so I'll be going"), and she demanded I help her out of the forest. Without waiting, she's on her feet and leaning her full weight on me, with an arm around my neck/shoulders. She weighed at least double what I do, and the way she flung herself on me wrenched my back. I moved away quickly, she lost her balance a bit but didn't fall.
I said that I was leaving, that we're less than a mile from parking, and that I was done with this encounter. We all had cell service, so I told them that if she needed to be carried out because of a f$%^#@^ blister, they could call people paid to deal with their s^%$ (I said both curse words).
They scream at me for abandoning helpless women in the wilderness and call me names as I walk on. The daughter called me f%$phobic (not sure why, I never said anything at all related to that). I yelled back that I just wasn't interested in their brand of bull%$#t.
I got to my car ten minutes or so later and left. On my way out of the park I stopped at the office. I know everyone there and gave them a heads up about the women. Some of my friends said I did nothing wrong. Two thought I was the AH because I work in state parks (not this place though!) and the women were clearly out of their element. So, AITA?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
NTA. A blister is not debilitating, especially with a proper blister plaster.
It’s also not OP’s responsibility on his day off to help someone with a minor injury. If he were on the clock then sure- whatever the policy is should be followed. But why would he risk hurting himself by letting her put her weight onto him because of a blister?
She should have accepted the bandaid or moleskin or whatever he had, put it on, and kept going. If she had a broken leg or something serious, sure- stay to help by calling 911. Otherwise she can figure it out.
As I read this post, my eyebrows started creeping higher and higher over each successive “wtf?” behavior from these women. The eyebrows have now resolved into hair extensions clinging frantically to the back of my neck.
NTA, OP. You were FAR more helpful than what they deserved and much more polite than many would have been. Any friends you have who are ragging on you are clearly suffering from rectal glaucoma; you had no duty of care to those women, and they certainly did nothing to elicit sympathy.
partially the ah. you could have said all that you did in a diplomatic way and they would have nothing to complain about. all you had to do was leave out the curse words and offer to make a call for them. period, end of story. now you've been nice as can be, even offered to call someone for them, and the rest is on them and you come out smelling like a rose in every way.
You could have been more helpful. It seems to me that you could have helped with the blister and help them to get on their way. A little help goes a long way and all you describe is their helplessness and weight problem. Maybe just maybe she was trying to get a start on weight loosing. You could have handled it better.