Teen feels erased by brother’s decision to name baby after him without acknowledgment. AITA?
"AITA for 'being weird' about my brother giving his son my name?"
Silly_Dependent_657
I'm (16m) the youngest of three. My siblings are 10 and 12 years older than me. I was the "oops baby." My brother is the oldest at 28. My sister is 26. My sister and I have a great relationship and she's my favorite person.
But my brother always resented me and he'll either ignore me or take out anything he dislikes on me and he's expressed anger at me for existing. My sister had to tell him to stop being a jerk to me far too many times. She'd ask him what his problem is.
My brother would say I completely messed up the family or why did I have to be there. He'd say our sister was his only sibling. I don't know why and neither does my sister.
She said the second he heard our parents were expecting me he was unhappy and then it got worse when I was born. He wasn't parentified or anything. So that's not why. I guess he just didn't want another sibling.
My brother's married (I wasn't invited to the wedding). His wife is pregnant. They're having a boy and they told everyone his name will be Milo, which is my name. I wasn't their for the big announcement but they were at our house yesterday for dinner and he was talking about the name.
My sister brought up the fact it's my name and he said no. That this is his son's name. His son isn't named after anyone. She told him she never said they were naming him after me but it is my name.
I told him it felt like he was trying to make a point of erasing me by doing this. That I wanted to be excited to have a nephew with my name. My brother said I won't have a nephew.
My sister told him he was being a dick still and I am their brother. He waved it off. My sister told me to ignore him. I thanked her. Then he added that I was being weird about the name and it wasn't my business.
He said no high schooler gets an opinion on another person's baby and he said Milo is a really popular name right now at 121 least year. Our parents said nothing. They never do.
My brother's wife started talking about how pretty the name is and how they couldn't wait to have their baby. Before they left he told me again to stay out of things and to stop being so weird. AITA?
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's post:
Chilling_Storm
Where are your parents in all this? They allowed your brother to berate you, insult you, say you don't exist?? NTA and if I were you every time I say brother I would express how exciting it is to have a child named after you and that you can't wait to teach baby Milo all the Milo things in the world.
And if brother does name the child after you, because he is, you came first, then at every turn tell Milo, the 2nd that you are the reason he has the name and isn't great that there are two of you. See if you can get your sister to do something similar. I am sorry you have had to deal with such an older brother.
Silly_Dependent_657 (OP)
Yep. They never intervened when he was like this, not even when I was younger.
Chilling_Storm
I am so sorry you were done so wrong by your parents and your brother. This is very very wrong.
Silly_Dependent_657 (OP)
Thanks. I'm almost used to it now. It makes me appreciate my sister even more because she never let it just happen.
Chilling_Storm
I am glad you have an amazing sister. Please don't get used to being abused, it isn't normal and it should not happen.
dart1126
NTA your brother and parents are royal a$$h0l3s. At this point you have to lean all the way in and drive him crazy and CONSTANTLY tell EVERYONE how honored you are that they are naming their kid after you…over and over….insist on calling him Milo 2.0, junior, Mini-Milo…just keep going.
Don’t let your brother ‘erase or replace or claim’ the name to be only ‘for’ him. His wife is an a$$h0l3 too. Can’t believe I forgot her. Drive them BOTH bananas with it. Don’t relent…I’m talking the next twenty years keep up with it.
MissionHoneydew2209
NTA - but you're parents sure are - your brother, too.
Info: Have you ever asked your parents why they allow your brother to be so abusive towards you?
Silly_Dependent_657 (OP)
I never asked them. I tried talking to them before but when they didn't show any sign they cared I just gave up.
aabbccbb
"His son isn't named after anyone."
Sure he is. He's named after you!
Tell everyone how honored you are that your brother wanted to name his firstborn son after you. Literally everyone.
When he's born, call him "Mini Me" and "King Milo the Second" and whatever other nonsense you can come up with, lol. Anyway, sorry that your brother's a loser and that your parents don't care. Keep close to your sister and ignore the rest. NTA.