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Couple leaves server a $154 cash tip at a restaurant, changes it to $4. AITA?

Couple leaves server a $154 cash tip at a restaurant, changes it to $4. AITA?


"AITA for changing our server's tip from $154 to $4?"

My husband (31M) and I (30F) do fairly well for ourselves. Not well enough that we have no financial burdens but well enough that we can enjoy nice things and like to help others when we can. One way I like to do this is leaving a large cash tip when a server does particularly well or is someone we really connect with.

Last night, we went to one of our spots and were served by a nice young lady I'm guessing in her early 20s. I decided to leave $200 cash for our $46 bill. I left cash on the table after the check came and, not needing change, we got up and left. Our server ran us down at the door and somewhat angrily demanded we must pay and we couldn't just run out on the bill.

I asked her if she had looked at the table and she said she hadn't. I walked back to our table with her, took the $200 and replaced it with $50. Enough to cover the bill and leave a small tip.

I told her I would have appreciated it if she would have glanced at the table first or approached us with a question instead of assuming we were running out on the bill. She seemed embarrassed and we parted ways.

My husband says I'm TAH because I could (even should) have just left the $200. I don't think I'm TAH because I think she could have handled the whole situation better and I don't appreciate being called a thief.

For clarification, when she rushed us at the door, she walked right past a chest high partition wall where you, very clearly, could see our table and that cash was left. So what do you think? AITAH?

Going to edit and add a little more info. We’re in small town Southern USA. I realize this in no way makes our area immune from crime but it truly isn’t a common thing here to see tips or payments go missing from tables. Paying cash is very common in our area/this restaurant.

The cash was clearly visible on the table and the restaurant was not busy. Our server had one other four top in her section and there were maybe 8 other customers in the restaurant.

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

superflex said:

NTA, I agree with your take 100%. There were multiple ways the server could have approached the situation that didn't start with step 1: accuse the customer of thievery. Your server just received a $150 lesson in how not to deal with customers. Hopefully it will serve her well in the future.

GrumpsMcWhooty said:

NTA, people pay with cash all the time. I don't know why on earth she thought chasing you down without checking the table was a good idea.

Infamous-Potato-5310 said:

She's probably just been burned before and caught crap from the manager. This is my guess from working crappy restaurant jobs for years.

New_Excuse_4003 said:

YTA you basically stiffed her because of a slight mistake.

Fit-Childhood1373 said:

YTA. You could have let them know that your payment was on the table. Then getting petty to teach a lesson? Stuck up, OP.

Whose_my_daddy said:

YTA. Few people pay with cash, so, while her approach was inappropriate, I can easily understand why she would jump to the conclusion you were dashing. Not only that, but many waitstaff are required to pay for dashers and she may have just been at her breaking point financially. This was a misunderstanding and you grossly overreacted.

The opinions were fairly divided for this one. What's your advice for this couple?

Sources: Reddit
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