'AITA for refusing to share my inheritance with my late dad's affair partner's daughter?'

"AITA for keeping the inheritance all to myself?"

Hi everyone. BACKSTORY: my dad (61M) cheated on my mom (55F) a year into the marriage. My mom found out relatively quickly due to the AP confronting my mom at work. They proceeded with divorce soon after.

Unfortunately, it took her a lot to get back to her feet (emotionally and mentally) as she was pregnant with me when this all happened. My dad got together with the AF (never married, just been dating for all these years) and had a girl. My dad and I have a great relationship.

INFO: My dad recently died. As we live in a different city, the AP family held the wake and burial while my mother shelled out the cost for the entire thing (one last generosity for my father, she says). While attending it all, I came to contact with the AP and her daughter Anne (21F).

We didn't get to talk but we did hear the word "will" and "inheritance" coming from their mouths while mingling. At the time, I didn't really care as I was pretty sure I wasn't getting much (my mom is super successful in her own right and my father must've taken that to account). Things came to an end and we left.

A week later, I was informed by my dad's lawyer (dad's friend and someone I consider an uncle) that I had inherited a 'good bit'. I was plenty shocked as it was burdensomely hefty, but I went through the process of inheriting it as I was still his daughter (despite everything).

No less than a couple of days later, Anne contacted me through Facebook and asked if we could talk. We arranged a small date in a cafe on the next day and met early in the morning. We reminisced my dad a lot and shared a bit of our lives (haven't talked to her that much before). We had a good time for the first two hours before Anne opened the topic of the inheritance.

I learned of the house and the money my dad left but Anne claimed it was a 'miniscule' amount. She shared it was hard to pay for her college tuition and live normally, she also shared some other really hard situations she was going through which I sympathized with. All this sharing was to simply ask me for all of my inheritance. Not a chunk or a percentage, just ALL OF IT.

I didn't agree, which may be selfish of me, but I did offer financing the remaining years of her undergrad to take off some of the load. I didn't offer anymore as I didn't want to create a mess I wouldn't account for but Anne rejected the financing and demanded for all of the inheritance as I wasn't a daughter to him like she was (idk what she meant by that).

After rejecting her again and again, Anne began to curse me and my mother out. It was getting very scary and aggressive so I had left when she started getting physical. That was yesterday.

I had asked my friends for advice. A good mix of them had told me to finance her education anyways and two of them had told me to just give her the inheritance (monetarily) to save the fuss (more of a joke) but I did consider that. I haven't told my mother as she doesn't like the AP and Anne. AITA????

Edit: clarifications: ** I do not live in the west but in SEA. It might not be a crazy amount for you guys but it is for me in my currency. My dad is European who migrated here for marriage while my is native/local SEA. Hope that makes a bit more sense.**

What do you think? AITA for refusing to share her inheritance? This is what commenters had to say:

resident_alien- said:

The inheritance is yours, it’s obviously what your father wanted. You didn’t influence him you didn’t force him to write or sign this will. You are more than generous and offering to finance your half sisters education, particularly since you don’t have any sort of relationship with her.

You should always do with your own moral compass guide you, but I don’t see how you could possibly be the @$$hole here

OP responded:

I guess its probably due to the Anne and AP having no income stream (minus the inheritance) while I have my mother. They are having a tough time with everything which is the main point everyone has been mentioning.

zanne54 said:

Before you do anything else, fact check the amount of Anne's inheritance with your lawyer. I have a gut feeling she's as immoral as her homewrecker mother. NTA, your Dad's will is his amends to you for the wrongs he did.

OP responded:

Haven't gotten a reply back from him. I doubt my dad would leave them with nothing so I'm guessing her amount of "miniscule" and mine are different.

Oranges007 said:

You need better friends. Why would you give her anything at all? She has a mother and whether her inheritance was "miniscule" or not has nothing to do with you.

And OP responded:

I guess everyone is hung up on the family part as Anne is still my half sister. Her mother also doesn't have an income stream which makes it even more messier.

Only-Wear7844 said:

NTA but do not give her a penny. I handle estates for a living and all you’d be doing is opening the gates for her to sue you for more money. If you start paying her she could claim in court that you agree she should have gotten more inheritance. You don’t owe her anything. If anything her mother owes you more inheritance for breaking up your family.

Use the money instead to pay back your mom for the funeral if you feel you want to share the funds with someone but absolutely not to the affair partner or her daughter. She got the perks of a full time dad while you got a part time one. Your dad probably felt the same and that’s why he gave you the amount he did.

OP responded:

I haven't talked to an estate attorney yet and this is genuinely scary... Thank you for sharing this.

Minute_Box3852 said:

Not. A. Dime. She got a full time daddy while you got scraps bc of his betrayal. Your inheritance was his apology. You're equal in a way. She got the dad. You got compensation.

And OP responded:

Haven't though of it in that way lol. I also felt the inheritance was a sort of apology