Backstory: one of my friends I graduated with last year just had twin girls so she and her fiancé brought the girls down so I could meet them. My friend brought one of her friends. I was watching 6 of my nieces and 1 of my nephews ages 9 months-12 years.
Now to get into what happened my oldest three nieces just got back from cheer practice and we’re in shorts and their cheer shirts. When my friend walked in with the twins, fiancé and friend I was hold the baby feeding her so I said hello and went back to feeding the baby.
We were laughing have a good time the kids were playing with each other. All of a sudden the girl looks at my oldest neice and yells that she needs to get some clothes on and how there are men and the girls shouldn’t tempt them to look. She then tried to yell at my other nieces when I yelled at her. “You do not need to yell at my nieces."
And "what they are wearing is fine. There are two boys in this house and one of them is 3 years old. The other one is our friend's fiancé and father of her twins. And you need to get out of my house because you will not make my nieces feel unsafe in their aunt's house.” My friends and her fiancé do not think I was to harsh or the ahole but my mother thinks I could’ve been nicer.
NTA. This was not remotely harsh given what this woman said. That woman is awful, and your nieces needed to see just how wrong she was. "The girls shouldn't tempt them?" If anything, you showed remarkable restraint.
NTA at all, now your nieces know they have someone to back them up!
NTA. If she’s that insecure best to move on. She’s being ridiculous. There are women everywhere scantily clothed. What is she going to do? Blindfold him? She needs therapy!
NTA and you showed more restraint than I would have. People tried saying that to my daughter once and Learned my kindness is Not a weakness, but a choice for their emotional safety, not mine. People disgust me with that logic.
Auntie OP ROCKS! Nicely done! Definite NTA.
NTA. You did the right thing by standing up for your nieces and ensuring their comfort and safety in your own home. Your friend and her fiancé supported your response, indicating its appropriateness. It's important to maintain boundaries when needed.
I wanted to add that after the girl left my friend who had twins and her fiancé told her they weren’t taking her home because they came here to visit she called her sister and she came and got her.
When she left I sat all the girls old enough to understand and I explained to them that they do not have to cover up. The oldest asked me why her outfit was going to temp men.
And I explained to them that some boys see clothes as an invitations to do bad things but I’m when you’re here at my house you are safe. And if a boy is making you uncomfortable you come tell me even if he’s an adult you tell me and I’ll handle it. I made it clear that she was wrong for yelling at them and telling you girls to cover up.
I did not go into a lot of deep explanation of this conversation because they are not my kids and I don’t think it’s right I explain that to them without their parents permission.
Also I wanted to say that a lot of comments are saying I was too nice or not harass enough I wanted to do and say so much more but with my neices and nephew their plus my friends two month old twins I didn’t want to scare all the kids or wake the twins.