My (M/27) girlfriend (F/27) has lots of plushies (about 30). Every morning, she arranges them on her bed, and every night they go from the bed to the couch, still neatly arranged.
One morning she asked me to put the plushies on the bed and got upset when I didn't arrange them properly. I asked her what the big deal was since they're gonna be back on the couch at night anyway, but she got upset because she "wants them to be comfortable."
Every now and then when we're watching TV or something, she'll ask me to hold a plushie because "they need attention." I'm fine with all this and used to do think it was cute but it's gotten to a point where she wants me to talk to them.
She'll pick up a plushie and pretend it's talking to me, and expects me to play along. I'm not into it and mostly just ignore this, but recently she got annoyed at me. She asked me why I don't care about them or talk to them and I said "you understand they're not real, right?" And she got extremely upset and yelled at me for being mean and not taking her seriously.
Some things to note:
-She's very stable, has a good job and is a homeowner.
-Some of the plushies have sentimental value (she's had them for decades) but some are just random ones she's picked up from target or whatever. Am I the ahole?
BeMandalorTomad said:
I thought I was weird a bit obsessive with my Build a Bear. NTA. It’s fine to be into plushies if that’s your thing. Dress them up, cuddle up to them, name them and imagine they have personalities, you do you.
No harm in that. When you expect other people to play along, you’re being weird. And Sal, my bear in his Slytherin robes, totally agrees with me.
Forward_Ad_7988 said:
I mean, a person can be high functioning and still have some serious issues going on that need to be addressed.
DestronCommander said:
NTA. Okay, I get that she loves plushies and treats them like children. If she wants to talk to them and treat them like they're real, that's her business. You only have to make sure you placed them properly and didn't mishandle them or anything.
You shouldn't have to be expected to play along with what she does. I get it if she's a kid but she's an adult and shouldn't expect others to be into plushies like her.
Beautiful-Mountain73 said:
NTA. I also care about the “feelings” of my stuffed animals but this… is concerning. At 27 years old, she’s about 2 decades past the age of this behavior being acceptable.
Your girlfriend is childish and frankly, really weird for wanting you to talk to them regularly. How can someone talk to stuffed animals regularly (and demand others to play pretend with them) and expect to be taken seriously?
CorporateSharkbait said:
NTA like I own a ton of plushies. My bf even helped me setup a nice hammock for them above our bed. He thinks they are cute but not really his thing. It’s one thing respecting your partner has different interests, another forcing it upon them.
Ok_Hamster1490 said:
NTA although this sounds like it is stemming from something deeper, possibly a way to cope or something like that. I would try to show support and encourage her to open up about why she’s acting like this, or maybe encourage her to speak to a therapist.