'AITA for not wanting to shave for my sister’s wedding?'
"AITA for not wanting to shave for my sister’s wedding?"
I’m F31, she’s F29. My sister is getting married in July and I’m her MOH. We’re really close but recently we’ve been arguing because she asked me to shave my legs and underarms for her wedding and I don’t want to. I stopped shaving those areas during lockdown out of laziness but found that I really enjoyed not shaving. My sensitive skin is happier, and I just enjoy not spending time/energy/money on hair removal.
If it matters, my body hair is light brown. My leg hair isn’t very noticeable from a distance of a few feet. My pit hair is a bit thicker but unless I’m wearing something sleeveless, nobody will see it.
And here’s the thing: the dress I’m wearing for the wedding is floor length and has short sleeves. But my sister is concerned because the skirt has a slit and the sleeves are kind of fluttery. So there’s a possibility that someone might see my body hair while I’m dancing or something.
And my thoughts are - so what if they do? It won’t be visible in photos and nobody is going to care if they happen to catch a glimpse. I’ll share a pic of a similar dress in comments. AITA?
EDIT:
I was told to put the pic of the dress so it basically looks like this except it’s a different color and has a slit in the skirt. Also, for everyone suggesting pantyhose, it’s an outdoor wedding in July and I run hot, so I’d rather not.
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
AnneOfOz said:
NTA. It's hair, it's not like we all don't have it. My family had 6 weeks notice of my wedding day and my 2 sisters were bridesmaids. The eldest out of the 2 decided to take hair clippers to her hair and off it came, 2 days before we gave everyone the date. She told me that she would understand if I decided not to have her as my bridesmaid due to new hairstyle and I said I didn't care. If she was happy, I was happy. Plus she rocked it anyway.
jaintynotdainty said:
NTA Can you imagine if - shock horror - someone saw that you had hair growing in places that it grows naturally on women, at a wedding of all places? The whole event would have to be cancelled and the marriage would be annulled. The shame that your family would suffer would last for generations and you would have to be forever known as Hairy McHairyness.
Greygal_Eve said:
NTA. I stopped shaving when I was backpacking around Europe in 1989. Haven't shaved even once since. Leg hair was pretty dark for the first few months, but over time started getting lighter and lighter to the point by a year, it was no longer noticeable. Armpit hair was always light and sparse. Nobody has ever noticed or said anything to me all these years, not even men I've been involved with.
Most of the world, women don't shave. Heck, even in the United States, shaving wasn't the norm until the the 1900s, tyvm Gillette marketing machine! It's not your problem your sister is beholden to the marketing gods and goddesses! The dress you linked is lovely! Wear it hairfully and happily! Be assured that ALL eyes will be on the bride, your sister!
[deleted] said:
Idk maybe you can take one for the team. Not everything has to be that complicated. Sometimes you do things you don’t like for the people you love. At the end, it’s a small request. I just hope people would stop making such a big issue of everything. Not everything has to be a platform to raise awareness.
I am all for body positivity and hair growth and what not. I myself have very sensitive skin and fast hair growth. Idk if my sister requested me to just shave for 1 day, ig i would do it. It’s not like it is going to kill me. If you are so sure, hair or no hair, it won’t be visible then why don’t you just do it for her sake.
IncomeSeparate1734 said:
I guess this is the unpopular vote but yes YTA. It's her wedding. It's her day. Shaving is a small inconvenience for you. Consider it a package deal for wearing that style of dress. Everyone sets aside their wants (within reason) and sucks it up because it's the bride's one special day. Your sister's wedding is NOT the time to start making statements about the appearance of body hair on women. Be shameless about it on the other 364 days of the year, not this one.
Fun_Spite_2266 said:
NTA. It's ridiculous how many people think telling someone what to do with their body is okay. For a freaking wedding, no less!
Ace_boy08 said:
NTA absolutely ridiculous. Leg and armpit hair are a natural thing for humans. You are well within your right to decline. If you want to, a fair compromise is to wear nude colored pantyhose/stockings. Again, it's up to you. Honestly, no one will even notice or care that you have leg and pit hair. Is she that insecure that she thinks your body hair will steal the spotlight?