Wife furious 'broke husband' won't pay for her friends' steak dinners. AITA? UPDATED
Splitting the check at a restaurant can be a famously tense situation...
When a conflicted husband consulted the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit's "Am I the A$%hole" about a conflict with his wife at a restaurant, people were there to help.
"AITA for only paying for my wife and I at a restaurant?"
I (24m) and my wife (24f) are a newlywed couple. My wife has 4 friends who she has been really close with since high school. For a celebration my wife decided to go to an expensive steak house.
The day comes and we go in separate cars there. We all eat and my wife slides the bill (700+) and proceeds to say. “The man should always pay for the wife and her friends.”
I laugh awkwardly saying why. She says because I’m the man. I tell her that the only other person I would pay for would be you and me. Her friends proceeded to laugh at me calling me a broke husband. I stand up and put 2 one hundred dollar bills for me and my wife’s food and leave.
My wife gets home and starts screaming at me. Saying I made her feel embarrassed. How she promised her friends I’d pay. And that her friends made fun for her on the ride home for marrying a man who can’t pay the bill.
I decided to pack a bag and head to my friend's house. I told my parents/friends and they say I should have just paid it. Now I’m having second thoughts if I over reacted. AITA?
Here's what the jury of internet strangers had to say about this one:
alexiagrace said:
NTA. Your wife should have talked to you about it before telling her friends you’d pay, not assume.
Similar_Strawberry16 said:
What is it, the 1950's? It's been a very long time since women were not necessarily expected to work, and therefore not necessarily be expected to pay.
But guess what, 1 income households are difficult these days, and women are both capable and expected to be able to make their own income as (mostly) reasonably comparable rates.
Odd_Welcome7940 said:
Super NTA...If she expects you to fork out an extra 400 to 500 dollars for her friends, she should have asked ahead. This was an absolute gold digger move by her. Is this really who you intend to spend your whole life with?
Moreover, how much would she have lost it if you asked how much fun the 1 man orgy was going to be later since all her friends are now your date? Pretended to be shocked and tell her you can't believe all her friends want to date you now.
Yes, I know that the second part is more of a joke, but if she wants archaic traditions used whenever it benefits her, suggesting an equally archaic and preposterous notion seems fitting.
Remarkable_Ad_6243 said:
NTA- Your wife should've asked you beforehand and then she would've been aware you weren't paying for HER friend's meal. Her friends also sound awful btw. You aren't a walking ATM benefiting her circle of mean girls.
Later, the post was edited to include:
Edit 1: Hi guys, I’ve read someone comments if my wife has ever acted like this. And she never has that why I just laughed awkwardly. The only other time she did this was when I didn’t buy her mom food.
Which happened when we first started dating. And it was the first time she ever screamed at me like that. Instead of escalating it, I just left. And when we do argue it’s not a screaming match.
For how long we have dated. I’ve known her since Freshman year of high school. And got together Junior year. (Dated for 8+ years)
I read some comments and decided to go talk to her tomorrow about what happened, why she did that etc.
I do recognize that I didn’t pay the full amount of me and my wife’s dinner. I do take fault in that. I should have added another 50-75 dollars to make it the price of 2 people.
For the people who say I forgot to tip, I go there regularly with my coworkers (each pay for their own plate) and always leave a good tip.