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'AITA for paying for my daughter's wedding?' 'A relative spilled the beans at dinner.'

'AITA for paying for my daughter's wedding?' 'A relative spilled the beans at dinner.'


"AITA for paying for my daughter's wedding?"

I gamble from time to time. And I recently won —like, life-changing big. Thrilled about my luck, I decided to surprise my daughter by paying for her entire wedding. I love her and her new fiance. The catch? I didn’t tell anyone that the money was from gambling, especially since my future son-in-law's dad has a serious history with gambling addiction. I wanted to avoid any drama.

Everything was going smoothly until a relative who knew about my win spilled the beans at a family dinner. Chaos ensued. My daughter and her fiancé felt betrayed that I kept this a secret, accusing me of being insensitive given the family history. They argued that I should have been transparent so they could have made an informed decision about accepting the money.

To make matters worse, the fiancé's dad is now questioning his own recovery, feeling triggered by the revelation. His family is blaming me for potentially derailing his progress. On top of that, other family members have started taking sides, creating a divide that wasn't there before.

I thought I was doing everyone a favor by covering the wedding and protecting them from the truth about the money's origin, but now I'm not so sure. AITA for trying to keep the peace but instead causing a family rift?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

Forward-Wear7913 said:

NTA. Your family members are a little extreme. It’s not like this money is proceeds from a crime. You won at gambling. You are also not responsible for the decisions an addict makes. It sounds like the family members like to blame everyone else rather than holding him accountable for his own behavior.

H_Lunulata said:

NTA. There is only one truth about weddings: someone will always be pissed off about something and will treat it as a mortal injury. Who is TA here? This one: "a relative who knew about my win spilled the beans at a family dinner" - that was intended to stir up drama. There's no way that wasn't a deliberate, malicious choice.

GirlStiletto said:

NTA - It doesn't matter where the money came from, as long as it was legal. Everyone else is putting their own petty morality on this.

Smooth_Papaya_1839 said:

NTA. Just revoke the offer. You can’t win with these people. They don’t know - you’re wrong for taking away their choice. They know - you’re responsible for fil potentially relapsing.

BlueGreen_1956 said:

NTA. If the wedding has not taken place, rescind your offer to pay for it. As for the fiancé's dad, he is not your problem or your responsibility.

Constant-Level4201 said:

NTA your heart was in the right. TA is definitely the person who spilled beans.

SouPNaZi666 said:

NTA - gambling isn't illegal. You don't have a gambling problem. Where your money comes from is no one's business. If daughter has an issue then don't pay for the wedding problem solved. You tried keeping hush to be sensitive to the addict.

Everyone was on OP's side for this one. What's your advice for this wedding drama?

Sources: Reddit
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