'AITA for potentially putting my sisters newborn baby at risk?'

"AITA for potentially putting my sister's newborn baby at risk?"

I, 21F, have been taking care of my older sister's (27F) dog for the past month. I struggle a lot with mental issues and have been since I was 14. I’ve always been the "therapist" of the family since I could remember...whenever my siblings needed to vent or needed someone’s shoulder to cry on, I was aways there.

However, they were never there for me in return, which obviously, led to me bottling up my emotions. Whenever I need to vent, it’s met with hostility, judgement and annoyance...but, I take it because I love my siblings so much and we’re all very close.

Since childhood, we haven’t had a great relationship with our parents so we always depended on each other. I believe this led to me allowing them to step all over me and treat me less than because my "problems aren’t as big as theirs." I am currently unemployed and have been searching for a job for a year now, but have had no luck of finding one.

This has led to my depression and stress getting worse. I am at constant war with my mother specifically over everything. I have debt I need to pay off and have been drowning in it secretly for a year since i’ve lost my job. I’m an overly stressed and no one is willing to hear me out.

Now that I gave my background, I hope you all can give me your honest feedback. onto the story. 2 years ago, my sister and her husband adopted a dog. Since I could remember, me and my little brother have always wanted a dog but our parents never let us have one.

When my sister and her husband adopted this dog they called us and asked whether we wanted a dog or not...we were over the moon excited and said yes immediately. They then changed their mind moments later after getting the dog and said that they wanted to keep the dog instead...

“But you guys can take care of the dog while we are at work” they said and of course, our love and need for a dog fogged our minds and we agreed. Fast forward 2 years, I'm now 21 and I've spent around 5k dollars on a dog that isn't mine. Me and my little brother cared for the dog majority of the week...

We bought its food, toys, crate, vests, training tools etc. The only thing we did not pay for were the vet bills. This dog is family to us but she never failed to remind us that the dog is HER dog.

Fast forward some months and now she’s pregnant. She's a first time parent so she is doing as much research as she can (as one does, no judgement!) however she becomes overly paranoid (which is understandable) and she asks me for a favor.

She asks me to take her dog for 6 months full time. She believes that it’s too critical and risky for her newborn baby to be in the same environment as her dog and I can understand that to an extent. I say yes like I always do and I take her dog. I’m now 2 months I've completely lost it.

My mental health has been declining so fast for the past few months and I am currently living in filth because my mother refuses to buy proper cleaning equipment. I used to be the one to buy the cleaning equipment but ever since i’ve gotten laid off I haven’t been able to provide the means.

Just recently our AC system went down and I’ve been personally trying to find ways to fix it myself, no use, and my mother and father, who have the money to fix it, refuse to fix it. Our washing machine isn’t working anymore ever since we took in an extra family member.

On top of everything, my sister's dog has started to pee everywhere inside the house because I am too busy at times to take her out more frequently. I must say however, I DO TAKE THE DOG OUT TO PEE!

Once in the morning, twice in the afternoon and then 1-2 before bed...but I should (and have) start taking her out more. I have this utter need to clean and clean and clean but I can’t seem to get up unless it’s to feed my sisters dog and/or my cat. No one really helps around here.

I called my little brother, who has been going over to my sisters place to help her take care of the newborn baby, and I started to vent and tell him that I needed him to come home and help me...I then hear my older sister in the background saying “you’re so annoying, you’re always complaining...

You’re starting to piss me off. I told you already that you can come over to my place and wash your clothes” I was silent after that. I didn’t want to speak anymore. I just hung up and started crying. I felt so unseen.

I get that I am not a mother and that I don’t have a newborn to take care of but I believe my problems are just as real as hers and I don’t deserve to be silenced when I need to vent AND I'M ALWAYS SILENCED. I took her dog, got in the car, drove to her place, knocked on the door, the door opened, I dropped the leash and her dog ran inside her house.

I walked away, got in my car and drove off. A series and texts and phone calls came in later...texts saying “you’re the worst sisterever, you are never allowed to see my nephew or my dog ever again” which I must say, did break my heart because I love her dog and her dog has saved me in ways I can’t explain...

But I cannot care for her dog 24/7 right now. I am done breaking my back for her and ignoring my own issues for her sake. Please give me your BRUTAL honest opinions.

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Full_Pace7666 said:

ESH mostly them. I think why your family is an ahole is obvious. Respectfully, you need to get your act together and a big first step is to grow a spine and start telling people NO. You’re in no position to be doing so many favors when you’re unemployed and in debt. Stop spending money on them and re-focus onto yourself. Best of luck.

OkBalance2879 said:

Yes, you absolutely are an Arsehole to YOURSELF for being a doormat for so long. I personally think your mental health will improve leaps and bounds if you cut this Toxicity out PERMANENTLY.

superdooperdutch said:

ESH, sounds like you need to take a complete step back from everything and figure your stuff out. Also, I don't know of any adult dog that would need to go outside to pee more than 4 times a day so either you are cloudy on how many times he's actually going out, or he's got something going on. Either medical or stress because of the cluster your home sounds like it is.

Willing-Training-796 said:

ESH to some extent. She asked too much, but you shouldn't have said yes.

CrazyOldBag said:

You’re wrong about you and all of your siblings being “very close”. If you were, they wouldn’t treat you like crap. You’re very close to breaking completely. As others have said, get medical/psychiatric help NOW — this very day, if possible. You need to remove yourself from the dumpster fire that is your home and get the chance to concentrate on YOU for a change.

Boldizsar17 said:

NTA the dog is not yours but you really shouldn't have said yes to taking care of a dog for 6 months. If there is ever a next time for something and you know you cant do it because of your situation say NO.