'AITA for putting my niece in a white dress for my nephew's wedding?'
"AITA for putting my niece in a white dress for my nephew's wedding?"
My nephew got married a couple months ago. It was a semi-casual wedding at the park. I am my sister's kids' guardian. She has 3 girls (10, 5, 3) and 2 boys (8 and 6).
I wanted the kids to look nice for the wedding so we went shopping. The boys both got new jeans and a nice shirt. The girls each picked out a dress. My youngest niece got a unicorn dress and wore fairy wings, my 5 year old got a dress with the princesses and wore a big pink tiara. 10 year old picked out a simple white dress with pink and yellow flowers.
I honestly thought my nephew or his wife would have an issue with the fairy wings or tiara, but my SIL hated that my 10 year old was wearing white. She wasn't in a puffy white ballgown, it was a little sundress with pink and yellow flowers.
They told me to change her clothes. I had a tee shirt and shorts in the car but she loved that dress and there was really nothing wrong with it. They've distanced themselves from us but we saw them at Christmas.
They got a present for all of the kids, except for the 10 year old. She's such a shy kid, she didn't say anything but I could tell it broke her heart. I confronted my nephew and his wife about it and they said they gave presents to everyone that behaved appropriately at the wedding.
I reminded them that she's 10 and she just wanted to wear a pretty dress, that did not resemble a wedding dress at all, to a wedding. I called them aholes for punishing a 10 year old for what she wore to a wedding but they're still saying it's our (my/her) fault and they still can't believe I let her wear white to a wedding. AITA for letting her wear a white dress to the wedding?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Corodix said:
NTA, how is that even white with the amount of color in it? And even if it were white, it's a 10 year old kid and doesn't look anything like a wedding dress. And even if they do have a problem with it, they should take it to you and not take it out on a defenseless 10 year old kid. What they are doing at this point is no less than bullying and they are indeed a bunch of aholes.
Now I've got to ask, where did you see them at Christmas, other relatives? Are those relatives just ignoring this bullying while it's happening right in front of them? Because if they're going to enable this bullying of a 10 year old by a bunch of so called adults then they're no better than this pair of assholes. I'd call them all out on it to see what they have to say about it.
Putasonder said:
Niece is 10 and yet somehow, the bride is less mature than she. NTA.
catinnameonly said:
NTA - These are awful and abusive people. Please do not allow the children in your custody to be around them.
Ok_Barracuda7135 said:
NTA, they must be so proud of themselves to be excluding a 10 year old over a dress. Maybe for her birthday they will post on social media how she wore a white pink yellow dress to their wedding and the bride was ignored all night because everyone was looking at the white pink yellow dress.
Sudden-Requirement40 said:
I don't think the no white applies to pre teens. My nieces and friends kids have all reused flower girl dresses and christening dresses at weddings. I'd maybe draw the line at a communion dress as those are basically little wedding dresses. But under 5s in all white is definitely the norm (or at keast not frowned upon here!)
Apart-Ad-6518 said:
NTA - while yes the general rule is to not wear white to a wedding bit that is for older people. Seriously they are just bullying a 10 year old girl at this point your nephew and his wife are terrible people.