"AITA for reporting my coworker to HR?"
Some backstory before we begin. I (F29) started as an insurance agent for a small (can only write within my state) company in July 2024. She (F, unknown exact age, within 10 years of my age), let's call her Debra, started a month and a half after I did. She is from California and is very PC, something that is not common here at all, especially in our office. She has had a grudge against me since day 1.
She is a secretary-type job title (won't say exactly due to revealing the company I work for). I try to get along with Debra, but she somehow takes offense to everything, for example, even me asking about her culture/religion with genuine curiosity (She is Islamic with some Jewish roots, and her husband is Christian). She tells me to "Google it"...
My husband is currently unemployed due to some BS at his job of 9 and 1/2 years (long story, won't go into details, just more drama). My job pays me salary plus commission. While my husband looks for another job, we are relying on my income to keep us afloat.
It has been difficult. In March, she was directing all New Business traffic to my co-worker, let's call him Dave, who is an insurance agent of 20 years with a neighboring company (He moved here to be with his girlfriend), causing me to lose money I desperately need. I'm on probation at work due to my low sales thanks to Debra. I already got that resolved with the office manager.
What set me over the edge was today. I come into the office an hour early so I can be the first one on the phones. My desk has a lot of stuff to show my personality: it makes me happy. I have Pokemon figures/plushies, anime figures, and pictures of my husband and I on my desk, showing that its obviously occupied by someone. I came in today and saw my figures and plushies were moved. There was a note on my desk that said:
"A family with small children came in and they played. Sorry." When Debra came in I asked if she left the note and she told me what happened. I thanked her for the note and asked if she could say this to the parents from now on: "The agent at this desk has asked we keep kids away when she is not in office. If you have an issue with that, this is at her request.
Here is her card, have a good day." I don't care if I get complaints about this, hence why I asked her to do this. Debra is HUGE about respecting boundaries and personal space. I've respected her boundaries and personal space by not messing with her desk at all.
She got very defensive and said "Why do you have that stuff there if you don't want that? Your desk is very enticing for children." She then started to berate how I was raised. I've had it with her and am tempted to take it up with HR. Should I do this? Would I be the ahole for reporting my coworker to HR?
FIRST UPDATE:
Thank you to everyone who commented their opinion on what I should do. I appreciate it. Now onto the update! I emailed my manager and told him the whole situation, upon the advice of a colleague who keeps things confidential. Lets call this colleague Steve.
Steve is also an insurance agent and has been with the company since the 80s and he has been a huge help for me. Steve suggested I call our manager, however with Debra always eavesdropping, I don't want her overhearing what is going on, and I want it documented hence the email.
I told the manager everything, from how she has treated me, to (reminding him about) the low sales for myself in March, to letting kids behind my desk. Steve stated that it is a breach of security to let ANYONE behind my desk without my authorization, let alone while I am not in office.
That was my basis of the email. My manager, lets call him Ron, knows that I don't get upset easily. I have never contacted Ron about a situation like this because he knows I usually let things roll right off me. He did not have much time to deal with it yesterday, so he asked if he could handle it on Monday since he is Out of Office today as well.
Steve told me to mention it to Ron so I could #1, get our managers on our side, and #2 not blindside management by immediately going to HR. I already have evidence with the office manager about Debra's treatment of me and the sales sabotage. Ron knows about the sales sabotage already so he knows I was having issues with Debra. Hopefully, this will finally get resolved on Monday. I'll post another update then.
Side Note: The gall of Debra! While typing this, she had the nerve to come to my desk and ask me for a charger and a wall plug...I told her I was using it (even though my phone is at 100%. Muhahahahaha!). I will not help her out anymore.
SECOND UPDATE:
So my manager, Ron, messaged me. He stated "I owe you that call. I want to talk to [Office Manager] too. I'll be in touch. Thanks." Something I forgot to mention previously is that Ron is going to retire once he clocks out on 6/5. All the agents in the agency have a meeting at our HQ that day so its basically our last day with/seeing Ron.
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Since we are a small agency, I believe that Ron maybe busy trying to tie up loose ends and trying to make sure that his duties are split among the 2 managers below him properly before he departs, maybe training them on those duties too (?), not 100% sure tho. If Ron does not handle it by the end of the day on 6/5, I will take it up with HR.
THIRD UPDATE:
I arrived early for my meeting. I spoke with Ron and he is 1,000% on my side. He let his boss know, we will call her Sara. Sara is below the CEO, and head of our department. Sara is visiting my branch tomorrow so if anything about this issue comes tomorrow, I'll let you all know. I'll update again once I know more.
FOURTH UPDATE:
Not sure if this is a final update. This is a doozie one though! I got fired. You read that right. F.I.R.E.D. So a month ago I was given a task to show some improvements by the end of the year, all documented too. There were not just a few minor improvements, no; these were multiple major improvements.
Pointless ones too that did not makes sense. I had until the end of this year, per my documentation...that was on 5/5/2025. They terminated me due to not making most of those improvements...it's been about 30 days...
My colleague in my branch even thinks it's BS. I'm feeling so many emotions right now and fighting a headache from bawling my eyes out that I can't type much more right now. I'll post a minor update tomorrow about how exactly it went down.
FIFTH UPDATE:
I've calmed down since yesterday. My headache is gone. I will spill all the tea on what happened. This will be a long update. I came in at 7:30am, like I always did. I had some documents to put into the system (basically signed policy applications). I even sold and Auto and Umbrella policy yesterday morning.
Sara and another manager (lets call her Jill) came in. Usually Sara would come down with Ron, but since Ron had retired, I figired ahe brought Jill along instead. They had asked to speak with me in private. I could tell something was off by their entire demeanor.
We went into the breakroom and sat down. Sara pulled out my file l, looked me dead in the eyes and said "We are terminating your employment with [Company Name]." Honestly, I knew it would happen, (I'll explain why shortly) I didn't think it would happen so soon.
I was terminated because I was not showing enough improvement for them and my sales were lacking. First, I'll explain this. When I went into the interview last year, I told Sara and Ron immediately that I was a new agent with no network, no networking skills, and no book of business behind me. I was basically a rookie who had no idea what I was doing and I needed to be shown the ropes.
I also reiterated this on day 1 of employment and multiple times during 1 on 1 meetings about my improvement. I had veteran agents like Steve helping me, but he worked at another branch on the other end of the state and had his own sales goals to make.
I was basically left to figure everything out on my own. I asked for advice from Ron, Jill (who was a new agent and got promoted within 4 months of working for the company), and Sara and took every bit of advice they gave me. I was #1 among around 20ish agents in handling calls, making outbound calls, quoting, etc, but my sales number did not reflect it.
I tried going out and networking by myself but I was obviously unsuccessful because I got no referrals. I asked for help from these managers in every area, and took every bit of advice I could, but my sales number did not reflect it.
I also came up with my own marketing ideas. Jill is incharge of that for the insurance department. She loved my ideas and helped me impliment them by getting marketing to print off or create anything I needed to impliment these ideas.
I will state something else. When this company puts an insurance agent on Probation, they had stated to all 20 of us agents that if we did not improve, it was not a guarantee we would be fired.
They would try and put us in a different area of the company first and the probation was suppose to last at least 3 months or until you showed significant improvement (which ever came first). My probation started in May. I was fired June...I was basically given 30 days to improve...then terminated...not even moved into a different department of the company, like they stated.
I may have a chance to get back at my company tho. Back in May when I was put on Probation, I was provided documentation about my probation, stating I would be on probation until either 1) I showed improvement, or [this is the biggie] 2) UNTIL THE END OF THE YEAR.
Our company years are from 1/1 to 12/31 so I was suppose to be given until 12/31 to improve, yet they terminated me just 30 days after probation started. I had that document stating this in with my personal belongings, but I think Jill took it out while I was putting bags of my stuff in my car (I had to make multiple trips).
I have HR's direct number and I am now requesting my Non-Compete and that document from them. I maybe able to take that company to court for pay until the end of the year if that document from May states "Until the end of the year."
Unfortunately my state is a "No-Fault" state so I cannot sue for wrongful termination, but I could sue for the document I mentioned previously. That's it for now everyone. Thanks for everything, and I'll keep you posted however I can. Stay petty everyone!