'AITA for refusing to break character at my own wedding? It's all medieval themed.'
"AITA for refusing to break character at my own wedding?"
So my (29M) wife (27F) and I got married last weekend. We’re both huge fans of fantasy books, especially The Lord of the Rings, so we decided to have a medieval/fantasy-themed wedding. Nothing over the top—just some cool decorations, a few costumes, and medieval-style food.
But here’s where things apparently went too far. I decided that, as the groom, I would fully commit to the role of a medieval lord. This meant speaking in Shakespearean-style Old English for the entire day. Instead of “thank you,” I said, “I thank thee.” Instead of “yes” and “no,” it was “aye” and “nay.” When I gave my vows, I declared my love for my wife as “a fire that doth burn eternal.”
I even greeted my in-laws with “Well met, travelers.”
I thought it was fun, my wife thought it was hilarious, and our friends were loving it. But her family was NOT having it. Her mom pulled me aside mid-reception and asked me to "just talk normal."
I told her, “Verily, I know not of what thou dost speak.” (maybe I was pushing it at this point?) She walked away shaking her head.
Then came the speeches. My best man, an absolute legend, started his toast with, “Hark! Gather ye round for a tale most wondrous!”
The whole room cracked up—except for my wife’s parents, who sat there stone-faced.
At the end of the night, my new father-in-law came up to me and said I had "embarrassed the family" and "made a joke out of the wedding."
My wife told him to chill, but I could tell he was pissed. Now my wife says maybe I should have toned it down a little, and her parents are still mad. To be fair, my wife did vow to stand by me ‘in sickness and in health…and in Renaissance Faire accents. AITA for refusing to break character at my own wedding?
The internet did not hold back one bit.
Glint_Bladesong wrote:
NTA. If you want to wear a mankini to your wedding and your partner supports you, go for it, it's your wedding. No one else's. If you want to speak in character and your partner supports it, go for it, IT'S YOUR WEDDING.
If some k-lljoys (and I think your in-laws may be posting on here btw) don't like it, tough. It sounds like if you took a poll of people at your wedding, the majority of people had no issue with it, so just ignore the boring minority and revel in the fun you had. We had Bohemian Rhapsody played by a 3 piece classical group (harp, violin, cello) at our wedding.
Afterwards certain invitees came up and said it was inappropriate to ask the group to do that as it wasn't proper classical. I just laughed and got the group to do an encore and smiled at the lemon sucking faces left behind. It was my wedding and I loved it. You didn't embarrass the family, you just didn't behave how they wanted you to behave, ye dirty vagrant. Congrats on your wedding.
jcocab wrote:
Aye merry revelers, may your days be as joyous as your nuptials. Narry be blighted by those who would see you be less than your most bonney self. NTA (Narry TA)
Pretentious-fools wrote:
NAH because you could have toned it down while talking to them in particular. Vows, speaches etc could still have been in old english but if they asked you to speak "normally" to them, that's not a big ask. Not everyone is able to keep up with really old dialects and shouldn't be forced to do so.
Lee_Otter wrote:
I think it depends on how your wife feels (congrats btw), if talking in a silly voice all day felt authentically you then awesome. NTA If she was upset about the voice then I would say YTA.
MizWhatsit wrote:
I think that sounds like all kinds of fun! I love fantasy fiction and have loved Shakespeare since I was in high school, so I would have dressed in costume and gotten way into it. But your wife's parents sound like the kind of literal-minded people who don't understand Renaissance-style vocabulary, and because they don't understand, they feel excluded, which makes them mad.
There are a lot of these folks in my hometown, often loudly proclaiming their dislike for "artsy-fartsy stuff." Well, I guess you know what kind of in-laws you have, and have learned to never try to get them out of their comfort zone. Luckily your wife seems to be your perfect match. NTA.
wundofakind wrote:
As a self proclaimed LOTR nerd myself…I hope this is satire but if not I did kinda chuckle & I’d say technically NTA unless they paid for the wedding or something lol. doing the voice as a bit? fine in small doses. but man I’d probably not wanna be a guest at this wedding😂 (this is coming from someone who’s dogs are named Shadowfax and Gandalf).
A9J9B wrote:
Sounds super annoying and i am a fantasy lover. But you like speaking like that. Your wife liked that you spoke like that. So it doesn't matter what I or anybody else thinks.
As a guest at your wedding I would have chuckled and maybe internally shook my head but I would have also appreciated how happy it makes you two and what a good fit you are together as you obviously have much in common and share the same humor. So NTA and your in-laws will get over it! Congratulations on getting married.
TinyCynth wrote:
It was your wedding. Not your parents-in-laws. That means you have to like it, that’s the most important thing. And they were ashamed just because the language was a bit different? They shouldn’t make such a fuss. Everyone else liked it. For one day in their lives, they’ll probably be able to stand it if someone talks and dresses differently to what they’re used to. NTA.