'AITA for refusing to let my sister’s kids sleep over after they destroyed my apartment?'
"AITA for refusing to let my sister’s kids sleep over after they destroyed my apartment?"
Last weekend, my sister asked if I could watch her two kids (7 and 9) for the night because she and her husband had an event. I love my nieces and agreed, even though I live in a small one-bedroom apartment. I thought it would be fun, and they usually behave well. Everything started fine. We watched movies, had snacks, and they seemed to be having a good time.
But the next morning, when I went to make breakfast, things spiraled out of control. They were running wild, and by the time I realized it, they had knocked over a lamp, spilled juice on my rug, and somehow managed to break my TV remote.
I tried to calm them down and get things under control, but they kept running around and even started playing with my work laptop, which I had to snatch away before they could do any damage. I was frustrated and overwhelmed. When my sister came to pick them up, I told her what happened and that I didn’t feel comfortable having them sleep over again until they could be more careful.
She laughed it off at first, saying, "Kids will be kids," but I stood my ground. I said I love them, but I need my apartment and belongings to stay in one piece. Now, she’s upset and says I’m overreacting. She told our parents, and they think I’m being too harsh and that I should just “kid-proof” my place better next time.
I’m feeling guilty because I know they’re just kids, but I also feel like my boundaries weren’t respected. AITA for refusing to let my nieces sleep over again until they can be more careful?
Commenters had a lot to say in response.
mewmew1991 wrote:
NTA. You’re entitled to setting rules and boundaries for a space you’ve made for yourself. Being told to “baby proof” your home when your nieces should have been taught to respect someone else’s home is weird as hell. Sister needs to actually be a parent and take responsibility of her kids actions.
jMCA97 wrote:
NTA! Not at all, your living space is your space and if her kids are damaging that space then you have every right to be hesitant about having them around again. 'Kids will be Kids' is such an awful view on the situation, my kids don't cause expensive damage every day to my house so the fact she has had that approach suggests that she is embarrassed and avoiding any accountability for their actions.
Stand your ground it is your house. Maybe a compromise could work and you could look after them at their own house as opposed to putting your place and belongings at risk.
Apart-Ad-6518 wrote:
NTA.
"They were running wild, and by the time I realized it, they had knocked over a lamp, spilled juice on my rug, and somehow managed to break my TV remote..."
"I tried to calm them down and get things under control, but they kept running around and even started playing with my work laptop, which I had to snatch away before they could do any damage."
At 7 & 9 they should know that sort of behavior isn't ok. It isn't for you to childproof your apartment. It's for your sister to ensure her kids know it isn't ok to trash other people's stuff. And if your parents feel that strongly they can watch her kids in future.
Peony-Pony wrote:
NTA. "Now, she’s upset and says I’m overreacting. She told our parents, and they think I’m being too harsh and that I should just “kid-proof” my place better next time. I’m feeling guilty because I know they’re just kids, but I also feel like my boundaries weren’t respected."
"Kids will be kids"? My children knew better than to act out when they are guests in someone else's home when they were 7 an 9. And they certain only knew better than to touch someone's computer. It's called setting expectations for their behavior. Let your parents keep them over night. "Child proofing" for a 7 and 9 year old, give me a break.
JeepersCreepers74 wrote:
NTA. 7 and 9 are too old to be running around like puppies with the zoomies and wrecking everything in sight just because you are busy making breakfast.
I'm sure your sister is sad to lose her free overnight babysitter, but if she's a good parent (and I'm already guessing she's not), she can use this as a teaching moment for her kids. I suspect grandparents have had a similar experience and are just worried that they will be asked to host the next overnight.
flowers_elated23 wrote:
NTA. Your apartment isn't a jungle gym, and "kid-proofing" doesn't involve bubble-wrapping everything you own. It’s reasonable to expect guests, no matter how small and cute, to respect your space. Maybe next time they can bring their own padded playpen—or your sister can host a sleepover at her house with your supervision rules. That way, they can learn the valuable lesson that 'Aunt/Uncle's house isn't the same as a bounce castle rental.