'AITA for refusing to pay for my girlfriend’s haircut after she donated her hair?'

"AITA for refusing to pay for my girlfriend’s haircut after she donated her hair?"

So my (26M) girlfriend (25F) has been growing her hair out for years. She always said she wanted to donate it, and I thought that was a great idea. I even told her it was really sweet of her to do that. Well, last weekend, she finally did it. She chopped off over 12 inches and donated it to a charity that makes wigs for kids with cancer. Amazing, right?

Except now she hates how short her hair is. She says she feels ugly, she misses her long hair, and she’s been super upset about it. She booked an expensive hair appointment at a salon to “fix it” (layers, color, extensions, I don’t even know), and then she sent me the bill—over $500—expecting me to cover it.

Her reasoning? She donated her hair to do something good, and I should support her because I encouraged her to do it. I told her that while I think what she did was amazing, I never told her to donate her hair.

That was her decision, and I don’t think it’s fair to expect me to pay for her to “fix” it now. She got really upset and said I was being unsupportive and selfish, and now she’s barely speaking to me.

AITA?

The internet did not hold back one bit.

angryatworld246 wrote:

NTA and I’m confused why dose a 25-year-old just hand you the bill for something stupid she did and had to fix.

Taroprimary1950 responded:

That was my first thought too. She went and spent $500 at a salon and just “sent him the bill”? No one does that unless they’re used to having their partner pay for everything. She’s probably expecting him to pay and is upset he’s saying no for the first time.

Brendamilton21 wrote:

I can see both sides here, but I think you're being a bit harsh. It was a really kind and generous act for her to donate her hair, and even though she made that choice herself, sometimes we do things to support the people we care about.

Paying for a salon appointment might have been a nice way to show that you appreciate the good she’s done, and that you're there for her emotionally, especially since she’s feeling down about the result.

dr_lucia wrote:

She's an adult. She made a decision. She should know the consequences of her decision fall on her. Do NOT pay for these hair extensions. NTA.

Alarming_Paper8357 wrote:

She is 25-years-old and can’t even take responsibility for a haircut? Good lord. Hell, no, you aren’t paying for fake hair because she has “haircut remorse.” You didn’t tie her down and chop off her hair, why should you pay for “fixing” it?

lndlml wrote:

NTA. Seriously.. she donates her hair and then wants to get hair extensions? What’s the point of that? Especially if she gets extensions that are made of other people’s natural hair.

Only reason she gave up her own hair was probably to pretend to be a good person and post about it on social media. Out of solidarity for cancer patients she could at least try to live with short hair for a couple of months.

Scota00 wrote:

I've donated my hair twice now and I knew that meant cutting off a lot of hair. I made sure that I had 12-14 inches past my shoulder before I made the cut so that I could live with the end result. Anything else is poor planning on her part. It'll grow. No reason for you to pay $500 for her decision.

kellseybri wrote:

NTA. You should not be expected to cover her choices. I don't want to call them bad choices, I think it's great she donated hair, but maybe in the long run it would have been better if she just spent that 500 on getting synthetic wigs to donate instead.

She couldn't have known she was going to hate it, but immediately jumping into burning 500 on something super temporary seems so...I don't know, it doesn't sit right I guess. People can do what they want with their own money. So let her use her own money to correct her choices.

Capable_Cheetah8363 wrote:

Also donated hair, 14 inches. The hairdresser cut before she made the cut was like “are you sure?” I mean it made a nice change for me, my hair was down to my bum almost so it was nice to have it shorter but not too short. GF should have donated less if she didn’t want it so short. As I understand the one I donated to will accept hair that is 7 inches or longer. 100% NTA.

Tyler_Broseph wrote:

NTA. You’re in no way responsible for her regret. If she really expected you to pay for it, she would have vocalized that prior to getting her hair did, not after the fact. She’s projecting her regret onto you. At most, I’d say you’re liable for comforting her and telling her she still looks good and reassure her that she made the right decision, not pay half a grand for a haircut.