Someecards Logo
ADVERTISING
'AITA for telling my husband that he would be responsible for his daughter from now on?'

'AITA for telling my husband that he would be responsible for his daughter from now on?'

ADVERTISING

"AITAH for telling my husband that he would be responsible for his daughter from now on?"

So my stepdaughter is about to be 13yrs. She has primarily lived with us since she has been 5 1/2. Over the years I have loved her and treated her like she was my daughter. Even after having kids of my own I never treated her differently.

Over the last year she has started becoming a habitual liar. She lies about stupid stuff and big stuff. Examples of things she's lied about: feeding the dog, who she's talking to, where she's met people at, if she did her chores, crushes as school. She's even made completely made up situations like being kissed, asked out, getting in fights.

All things we have caught her lying about and she will continue to lie to us until the proof is in her face. The biggest thing is earlier in December she took my little one downstairs and offered to watch him and my two younger one while I slept a little in the morning (I work night and my husband was at work).

She asked what time I was getting up and I told her 9am which was in like 30 min. I wake up and she was GONE. Her and the dog were gone. My 6 month old was in his bouncer crying and my daughter (6yrs) got my dish soap and smeared it all over the bathroom and then locked herself in there when she heard me coming.

My son (4yr) said she took the dog for a walk. She has no cell phone. I got the situation at home taken care of and she still wasn't home. I realized it's been an hour and I go out and start looking for her. We live in a small town. I searched for 3hrs. My husband finally leaves work in a panic and we search and called the police. A search and rescue dog finally found her.

It took us 6 hrs to finally find her. She to this day won't tell us where she was at. Fast forward to today. She said she her stomach has been hurting for 2 days. She's thrown up once and had diarrhea. None of which happened while my husband and I were around. I just got over a cold, sinus infection, stomach bug and kidney infection. So I feel bad and take her to the pediatric quick care.

On the way there I tell her if she is faking just to tell me, so I don't waste time and gas to drive her. It's my last day before I have to go back to work and I need to get somethings done. She tells me no she really is in pain. Tells the doctor the same. But in the waiting room she's laughing and talking normal. That doc suggests we go to the ER because of how much pain she is in.

Now in the ER they ruled out appendicitis and she's again laughing and talking just fine and come to find out she has been EXAGGERATING how much pain she's in and I'm stuck waiting in this hospital for x-rays and test results. My husband can't switch with me cause he has no gas and he we had to drive 30 min into town to come to this doctor.

I am literally about to cry. I'm so mad. I told my husband he can deal with everything with her from now on. All discipline, appointments, parent teacher conferences and everything. He thinks I'm overwhelmed and going to far. I married him and she was part of the package. So AITA for telling him this?

The internet did not hold back one bit.

sweetieevirtual wrote:

NTA. Girl, you’ve been doing everything for years, and it sounds like you’re completely burnt out. You’re allowed to set boundaries, especially when you’re being disrespected and not getting the support you need from your husband. He needs to step up as her dad. It’s not giving up; it’s protecting your mental health.

friendlily wrote:

After the stunt she pulled endangering your other kids, herself, and the dog, that would have been the final straw. You and your husband need couple's/parenting counseling and she needs intensive therapy.

If he is not immediately willing to step up and do his fair share, and make serious changes of setting boundaries and consequences for her behavior, I would take the other kids (and dog) and leave them to it. NTA.

Winterfront1431 wrote:

NTA. I mean, we were all little Sh#ts at that age, but not to this extreme. Personally I'd take my kids and move out, she put all 3 of your kids in danger by leave and then wasting police time having them look for her to then think she can refuse to tell you where she's going.

I'd do it. I'd tell him, cooking for her, doing her laundry, taking her places, school, everything is now on him. Or I'd pack my three kids and leave. He has let this go on too long, so this is on him.

410Dreamer wrote:

Absolutely not. Your stepdaughter is testing boundaries, and it’s clear you’ve been carrying the mental, emotional, and physical load of raising her for years. You’re not the bad guy for finally saying, “Enough.”

This isn’t about abandoning her; it’s about your husband stepping up to his responsibilities as her father. You didn’t sign up to be a one-woman parenting team. Her lying, sneaking out, and this latest stunt at the ER isn’t just “teenager stuff”...it’s a cry for structure and discipline.

And right now, your husband’s laissez-faire attitude is leaving you to clean up the mess, literally and figuratively. You’re allowed to set boundaries, especially when your efforts aren’t being respected. Tell your husband to stop being a passenger in parenting and take the damn wheel. You’re not her punching bag.

ForestDreamer2 wrote:

It sounds like you're completely overwhelmed and doing your best to manage a tough situation. Your husband needs to step up and share the parenting responsibilities, especially since she's his biological daughter.

Sources: Reddit
© Copyright 2025 Someecards, Inc

ADVERTISING
Featured Content