'AITA for telling my supervisor's sobbing wife to leave the office? There was a whole scene.'

"AITAH for telling my supervisor's sobbing wife to leave the office?"

I (29F) recently scored a nice job at a real estate small business. Everyone is very friendly and I like it there a lot. Unfortunately, my supervisor (mid30s?M) is....shall we say "problematic." Let's call him Gene. I've had several small issues with Gene involving s-xist language, particularly about our other pregnent coworker, but that's beside the point. Point being, he's kind of an AH sometimes.

So yesterday, Gene got some bad news. After very loudly screaming at someone on the phone for over an hour, he goes out into the hallway and tells me and another coworker (also loudly, he is NOT hiding this) that apparently he leant a VERY large sum of money (5 figures) to his dad who told him he would invest it in what was basically a get rich quick scheme.

To no one's shock but Gene's, said scheme didn't work out, and now Gene is SIX figures in total debt.At this point I say "man that sucks!" and go back into my office because I am behind on my work. This is where the sobbing wife comes in. My office shares a wall with Gene, and the walls there are paper thin.

I can hear everything, no matter how quietly people talk. Not that "quiet" meant anything here, as while I was attempting to catch up on work, I start hearing Gene breaking the news that he f--ked up to his wife (who also happens to be recently hired by our business, hired by Gene, funny that). The wife is, understandably, audibly upset, and she starts crying.

This makes Gene angry, and he starts yelling at her to suck it up and calm down because "he'll deal with it and she never has any faith in him", which makes her cry harder, and meanwhile I have been staring at a very important email about to be sent for the past 3 minutes, unable to concentrate due to sobbing woman and asshole man. So I got up and knocked on his door.

Opening it revealed a crying woman and Gene, to whom I very quickly rushed out "I'm really sorry, I know you're going through stuff, but can you PLEASE take this somewhere else?" I was talking directly to Gene, but his wife seemed spooked and a little offended and pissed off. They both quietly skedaddled, and I didn't see her for the rest of the day.

I hold absolutely zero sympathy for Gene - he was an idiot who wasted his money on get rich quick schemes doomed to fail, doing so while knowing he has a wife & two young kids to care for. He's barely been at this job for longer than I have (my real actual boss is a really cool dude), and my overall vibe from Gene is pretty rancid.

TL;DR - I got fed up with hearing my supervisor scream at his distraught wife (over a f--k up HE did) at work, so I told them to take their drama elsewhere. I don't give a f--k about supervisor, but I feel pretty miserable about being short with the wife.

The internet had a lot to say in response.

GrouchyLingonberry55 wrote:

YTA, this wasn’t appropriate for you to deliver this message nor in the way it was delivered considering your colleague (not just bosses wife) was offended. Report the incident to HR it’s very likely you may receive retaliation from your boss or a complaint from your colleague.

Next time find a different space temporarily, headphones, or request to work from home, or if you can knock on the door and let the people involved compose themselves and offer the option to work remotely or from another office space to give them privacy.

But you don’t get to ask them to leave your bosses closed office to convenience you. Sound travels and that’s something everyone needs to deal with.

Msterious wrote:

In a real estate office? And three minutes of staring at your email is all the time you'd give before you essentially tell them to calm down or leave? Yeah, but YTA here. I get it that they are not people you like, but your empathy level is entirely absent. Would you want to be treated that way if you made a terrible decision with a life-destroying outcome because you misjudged badly?

BabyMystic22 wrote:

You know it’s bad when the office drama makes you wish for a classic sitcom laugh track to drown it out. Sometimes you just have to draw the line between office hours and real-life soap opera.

whatsomon wrote:

NTA. You’re entitled to a work environment where you can focus without being distracted by personal drama. Gene brought his personal issues into the office and made them everyone’s problem.

While it’s unfortunate that his wife was caught in the crossfire, your request was reasonable and directed at the inappropriate behavior, not her personally. Gene’s lack of professionalism is the real issue here.

dangitdoja wrote:

NTA, but I do recommend you report the incident to a supervisor before Gene finds a way to fire you. His workplace conduct was completely inappropriate and warrants a complaint. The office is not couples counseling and they were on the clock.

TeamGlider wrote:

In addition to it being a very bad idea to talk to your supervisor this way, it seems like you could have given it a bit more time.

It doesn't sound like it was going on for very long at all before you intervened, and interruptions to the work day are frustrating but pretty routine. Sometimes a client traps you with a really long story, sometimes the internet goes out, sometimes you're in a really stupid meeting for two hours, and yet life goes on.

So I got up and knocked on his door. Opening it revealed a crying woman and Gene

Did you just knock and then open the door?