Amateur baker gives cake to family rather than saving it for BF, 'he ALWAYS gets first helpings.'
"AITA for giving the cake to my family rather than saving it for my boyfriend?"
I am an amateur cake maker as a side hustle of my full time job. I make cakes for friends and family if there is a celebration coming up and I also sell them occasionally too. I’m always baking cakes as I love doing it!
This weekend was my boyfriends mums birthday and we got an invite to go for the weekend. they live a good few hours drive from us so we stay overnight, I asked my own parents if they could babysit our 2-year-old daughter for the weekend so we could go.
(We usually take her but this time we just wanted a break without our daughter). my parents agreed and I baked my boyfriend's mum a birthday cake. it was Funfetti with jam and fresh cream and I baked it the night before and decorated it the morning that we left.
I dropped my daughter with my parents and then went to see my boyfriend's parents. My daughter always loves my cakes and I promised I would save her a slice when we came back. (She saw me decorating it and asked me for some but I had to explain it wasn’t for us to eat yet).
Anyway, we stayed the night with his parents, his mum loved the cake but we went out for a meal and ate lots of food so there was lots of cake leftover. We all had a small slice but over half of the cake was left as it was quite a large one that I made.
My boyfriend's parents asked if they could keep it as they would finish it and I said of course, but i would like to take a slice for our daughter as i did promise her i would bring it back for her.
His dad cut 4 slices which we took home. We came home and I went to pick my daughter up from my parents house, they saw I had some cake and I asked if they would like it (my sister was also visiting) so everybody had a slice and my daughter was happy as Funfetti is her favorite.
I went home with our daughter and my boyfriend asked where the rest of the cake was. I said my parents and my sister ate it. He was upset with me as I didn’t save him a slice and just gave it to them when he thought it was for him to eat.
I said he never asked me to save it for him and he said I didn’t ask if he wanted it or not. he was really upset that he only ate a small slice earlier after dinner and he didn’t get to enjoy it fully.
I feel like an AH for giving the cake away before checking if he wanted it, but every time I bake, he always gets first helpings. Plus his dad cut off more than we asked for to take home so I assumed it would have gone to waste if my family hadn’t eaten it. AITA for giving the cake away to my family?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
FormerHeron8688 said:
So, you gave the cake to the people who kept your two year old for the weekend so y'all could relax? NTA just on that alone.
Tryingagain2024 said:
NTA. You didn't know he wanted it and were being generous. Seems like he gets plenty of cake so he should really stop whining. Tell him next time you'll check but tbh he'd still be the ahole if he wanted the cake over your family who was babysitting.
ScarletNotThatOne said:
NAH. Just some reasonable assumptions on all sides, that didn't align. Oh well. The cake must have been yummy!
Couette-Couette said:
NTA. Your parents took care of your daughter for the WE. I assume that they did it because they love her and are happy to allow you and your boyfriend childfree time. Still it was normal to bring them some cake. Your boyfriend is a little bit selfish here.
Your parents just babysat so you could spend time with his family. Giving them some cake is the least you could do. Might want to remind him of that. NTA sounds like he is getting a bit spoiled and feeling entitled with the baked goods.
Individual_Ad_9213 said:
NTA. If he wanted you to save you some, he should have asked you to do so. "You should have checked with me, first" doesn't cut it.