When this man is conflicted about his wife's ashes, he asks Reddit:
I (M44) lost my wife about five years ago at the age of 34 due to cancer, we had been married for almost ten before that and I had known and been friends with her another ten before that.
After her death I chose to have her cremated and I put the urn in a little shrine with some of my favorite pictures of her and her wedding ring.
It’s been up in my house ever since and every year on her birthday and on the anniversary of her death her family (Father Mother and sister) come over and we have dinner and discuss our favorite memories.
Well her father and mother do her sister had always been quiet during these moments and would rarely offer much of a response but I figured it was her way of grieving and never bothered her about it.