"AITA for asking my manager not to hire my former friend?"
I (18F) am in my last year of high school. I go to a school for gifted students where, as long as we keep our grades up and complete all tests, no one really cares about attendance. I barely go. I study better alone, and I pick up concepts quickly. Since I turned the legal working age in my country (15), I’ve been working nonstop. I love working, especially typical “teen” jobs like retail, waitressing, etc.
Right now, I have three jobs: waitress at a bar, barista at a bakery, and receptionist at a kids’ club. A year ago, I helped my friend get a summer job where I was working at the time. She wanted something to do, and the store needed summer workers. But she’s always been lazy. She promised me she would work hard because my name was attached to her hiring.
She didn’t. She sat the entire time. It was a retail job, and she refused to move from the register even when customers asked for help, she’d just tell them to find someone else. We had multiple coupons we needed to memorize; she never bothered to learn them.
Every time someone used one, she called for help from another employee. She made a ton of extra work for everyone. She got fired after two weeks. Meanwhile, I got a raise and was made “responsible” for the store whenever the manager wasn’t there.
Ever since then, she’s been weirdly obsessed with working wherever I do, like she wants to “prove” she’s better than me. So far, she got hired at two more places I worked: the bakery where I still work, and a receptionist job at a law firm. She was fired from both.
Last week, I found out she scheduled an interview at the bar where I work now. I immediately talked to my manager and explained what happened at every job she’s had. I told him that if he hired her, I would quit because I’m not willing to deal with that toxic dynamic again.
He didn’t hire her. And now she’s blaming me, and she’s right, because I did warn him. But I don’t think I’m fully at fault. I told her she needs to take responsibility for her own actions. She and her friends have been harassing me nonstop to apologize and ask my manager to hire her anyway. What should I do? Am I the ahole?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
goodreadKB said:
NTA I wouldn't recommend a lazy friend either. Your reputation has already been damaged once so it is wise of you to not let that happen again.
Laosiano said:
NTA. Sounds almost like you're being stalked by your friend. I'd tell her to stop following me around.
rubies-and-doobies81 said:
NTA. Just block her and move on with life.
JGalKnit said:
You were a reference. The same way that if any person that they trusted and worked with gave one. You did the right thing. NTA.
Busy-Ad-7917 said:
You did the right thing. NTA. It’s disrespectful of her to have been lazy at the last job you got her and then she doubles down and wants you to do it again? Absolutely not!
Letters_from_summer said:
NTA. Even if you told the manager you reconsider and he should give her an interview he isn't going to do it unless he is 22 and an idiot. It is not uncommon for someone to talk to their manager or the HR department when they get notice someone who may not be the best fit for an organization because they bring the drama is applying.
The company representative then usually weigh the pros and cons of continuing on with the applicant, the risk of conflict, the risk of losing the current employee, and then make a decision, hopefully one in the best interest of the organization, on how to proceed.
In this case your manager chose to keep you, a worker they obviously trust and value, over a new applicant. Mute her and her friends, do not engage at all, and keep a file of their attempts to force your compliance in case you need to take legal action.
PinkNGreenFluoride said:
NTA. I get that in some areas there's a limited pool of jobs for teens, so sometimes you'll coincidentally work with some of the same people, or compete for the same openings. But following you around and explicitly seeking jobs at every place you work, because you work there, is legitimately stalker behavior.
bamf1701 said:
NTA. Time after time she has shown you what her work ethic is and, if you do keep recommending her, her actions will run off on her. Honestly, she needs to get a job on her own merits and stop hanging onto your coattails.