'AITA for asking people not to buy toys or clothes for my 3 month old baby for Christmas?'
"AITA for asking people not to buy toys or clothes for my 3 month old baby for Christmas?"
I made a post on Facebook I’ll copy n paste here: Christmas is approaching quickly, and I know some of you are excited to give a gift to [babies name] for his first Christmas.
We ask respectfully that you avoid toys and clothes as we have more than enough and are trying to limit the amount of toys he has (less is more!!) If you are stuck and would like ideas please send me or [partners name] a message! Thanks everyone, very much appreciated.
My partners grandpa commented “Beggars can’t be choosers." My MIL went on a rant to my partner that people will view it as disrespectful and rude, and that people give gifts to make themselves feel better and its their money so they can choose what to gift him.
I think she’s offended because she’s already bought him toys, my partner said she bought him toys for christmas before he was even born! My thinking behind it is we would rather people not gift him anything or gift something useful like swimming lessons or books. He already has all the toys he needs and we live in a tiny space so I don’t really have the space for anymore toys or clothes.
They would end up in the charity bin. Also, he’s literally 3 months, he has no idea wtf is going on, he can't conceptualise gifts or Christmas. AITA for making a Facebook post asking people not to gift toys or clothes?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
edebby said:
NTA. You are not forcing anyone based on the syntax here, so I don't see why they are all whining about. "Please Avoid", "If you are stuck and would like ideas" - why are people so difficult? I would LOVE to get actual ideas for gifts that the parents will be excited about, and not by the current baby trend that a dozen other people will get him.
The hustle or returning the gifts to get a refund just to have what you really need is so time consuming for parents to a newborn that people can be more considerate without even wasting any time. Just get the idea for the gift should buy, and go to the same Amazon\Target\Aliex site you use and buy that gift. Sheesh.
2moms3grls said:
100% tacky. Either say "no gifts" or add the part about books being welcome. Otherwise it comes off as a cash grab. I'd be put off.
Tired_trekkie1701 said:
YTA. Posting on Facebook about the kind of gifts you want your child to receive is obnoxious. If your kid gets too many toys, return or donate them. Let the grandparents get their grandkids what they want. Feel free to chat with expected gift givers and throw them hints, but a Facebook post?? It is just so tacky.
pumpkinbubbles said:
YTA. Wording sounds like a cash grab which is gross. Why not say no gifts?
AMissKathyNewman said:
YTA. Why does your entire Facebook need to know this? It comes across as quite obnoxious and tacky imo, I’d say that is where Grandpa’s comment is really coming from. If the people buying the presents want advice they’ll ask or you can personally tell them instead of making a generic post to every Facebook friend you have. I think you are well intentioned, but the execution is totally off.
Listen-to-Mom said:
I’d say YTA. Accept gifts graciously. It’s fun for people to buy things for your child and the clothes are hard to resist. You accept the gift, thank the giver, then decide whether to keep it, return it, use it or give it away.
I tried to persuade my parents to donate to a college fund we had set up for the kids and they said no. The shopping, buying and wrapping is the fun part for them. If someone asks what you’d like then you can suggest swimming lessons, books,etc.