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Photographer asks wedding guest to leave, 'stay out of my way.' 'I am family.' AITA?

Photographer asks wedding guest to leave, 'stay out of my way.' 'I am family.' AITA?


"AITA for asking a wedding guest to leave and stay out of my way?"

I (40f) am a wedding photographer. TO start this story is a bit long, but let me give you some background. When I book a wedding, I make it very clear to the bride, we'll call her Amber,19 and groom, lets call him Sam, 19 these rules apply, with their permission!

No phones allowed in the ceremony.

If there are any photos they want private please let me know. THIS is the's couples decision!

I will not hold back to tell people to put their phones down or not to step in front of me. (WITH the couple's permission).

My most recent wedding happened this past Friday. I knew within the first 15 minutes of guests arriving (including the grooms mother, let's call her Susan, and the bride's aunt, let's call her Karen, for good reason) that this would be a long day.

During the ceremony, as Amber was walking down the aisle, Susan decided she wanted to place herself so close to the aisleway that as I am trying to capture the Sam's face. I did my best to work around her without actually placing myself in the aisle. Thankfully as I have begun editing I think I will be able to edit and possibly remove her from the photo (thank god for photo shop).

This was only the beginning of her being in my way. The rest of the ceremony went beautifully. After the ceremony ended everyone was asked to move to the reception hall so we could continue on with taking photos.

After all the basics, family and wedding party photos, I asked everyone besides Amber and Sam to head out so we could get their solo and couple shots done. This session was one of the ones that they requested stay private.

I made sure the room was empty before we began. We started with a beautiful shot of Amanda propped on the piano, and Sam standing beside her. As I was posing them, I saw her, Karen at the front door with her phone out recording. I sighed, took a deep breath and turned to her.

"Ma'am I am sorry, but I need you to leave the room, these photos are for the bride and groom only and per their request they don't want anyone recording or taking photos besides me."

She huffed a bit, rolled her eyes and put her phone away and headed back to the reception. After this, cue us heading outside to get photos of them under the beautiful arches and large wooden french doors. As i begin posing Amanda in front of the big doors, here comes Susan.

"Oh my gosh, thats so beautiful!" she said.

"Thank you, but please go inside, this is a private session," I said politely.

"I am just watching," she retorted. I tried to hold in my bitch-look-face and smiled.

"I understand, but this was a request by the bride and your son to keep things private," I said, "Please go inside, I can't begin until you go..." I said. Again the huffy sigh and I swear a tiny foot stomp before she headed inside.

You would think this is where it ends. It doesn't. Now we go to the part where I think I may be the ashole. During the father-daughter dance, here comes Karen with her phone to RECORD the entire thing, OVER my shoulder.

I don't care if guests take photos or videos of these moments, and neither did Amanda or Sam, BUT she was directly over my shoulder and occasionally stepping in front of me to get close up. I took a deep breath tried to take the red i was seeing to a light pink before I turned to her.

"Ma'am Amanda and Sam have PAID ME to do this job, I need you to stay out of my way or I am gonna have to ask you to go sit down. I can not capture these moments if you are constantly in my way and interrupting..." I said, probably with a bit of sass.

"I am family," she said.

"I get that but this is my job and your interfering, now please step aside or go sit down," I snapped. (yes snapped, snapped so hard i am pretty sure she got word whiplash).

So yes I do my best to be a professional, but I had had enough. I worry I may have been to rude and the way her and her entire table glared at me for the rest of the night, I worry I may not have handled this the right way, so... AITA?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

Z3D_l0v3stog0ssip said:

NTA you handled it correctly. There was no nicer way to put it.

Commercial_Sir_3205 said:

NTA I think you need to add a 4th rule where all the guests are informed multiple times that a professional photographer has been hired so please don't take any pics and enjoy the wedding as a guest. I think showing unedited photos with guests getting in the way will help reinforce why you have this rule.

CleoJK said:

I used to do wedding photography for friends, and this sort of thing was one of the reasons I stopped doing it. Grown people act like children at weddings. I'd be furious after each one, for the same reasons...NTA.

Ok-Money2106 said:

NTA you got paid to do a job mom is over stepping. You tried to be nice multiple times they keep going I would have done the same. Good for you!

goddessofspite said:

NTA. The bride and groom tipped you. They were happy with the service you provided on what was their day. Doesn’t matter what the guests felt it wasn’t there day

AphasiaRiver said:

NTA People who are obnoxious enough to get in a professionals space would usually take offense. She probably spun the encounter in a way that made you look bad. As long as the bride and groom are happy you’re good.

Sources: Reddit
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