'AITA for asking my wife to stop getting me the same Christmas gift every year?'
"AITA for asking my wife to stop getting me the same Christmas gift every year?"
My wife (26F) and I (25M) have been married for five years. She is a prankster and likes to play jokes on her family. All her jokes are harmless and I really adore her funny side.
In particular, she is a huge fan of this one prank/joke she pulls on me every year. For the last four years, she has gotten me Christmas gifts in the theme of the movie The Waterboy with Adam Sandler.
For context, I get very thirsty at night and get up about four times to get water. She always makes jokes about it, but I don’t mind. However, whenever it’s Christmas, she always gets me gifts themed around The Waterboy.
I have gotten things like Adam Sandler’s football jersey and a mug with the quote “Now That's What I Call High Quality H20.” I found it funny the first two years, but it was starting to get old and hurt my feelings.
I would work hard on my Christmas gifts for her to make them meaningful like scrapbooks, and in return, I just got more gag gifts. I felt like the same level of effort or thought wasn’t being put into her gifts or thought process.
I spoke to her after the second year and told her how I felt. I felt like a greedy AH though because she doesn’t have to get me a gift and just wants to make me laugh. She didn’t really have a reaction after I told her this and just told me ok.
I don’t know if she forgot, but for the next two years I still got more gifts about The Waterboy. It kinda hurt my feelings because she knew how I felt about it. I tried making comments in a joking way like, “Ah not Adam Sandler again” and “When is The Waterboy going to stop haunting me,” but I don’t think she got the message.
This brings us to two weeks ago when we were watching Elf and started to give ideas about what we both wanted for Christmas this year. I told her I am fine with anything as long as it’s not Adam Sandler related (I tried to say this in a joking manner).
She took offense to the comment and started to cry. She went to our room and locked herself in there for an hour. I felt horrible, especially because she is three months pregnant, and tried apologizing but she ignored me.
I have never made my wife cry before and I felt like the biggest AH in the world. I grew up in a horrible household where my father was never truly a husband or a father and I vowed to never treat my wife like he treated his. Seeing my wife cry like this made me feel like I was just like my father and I started to cry.
She eventually left our room, but she has barely spoken to me since then. I keep trying to apologize, but she just ignores me. In the past two weeks, we have spoken probably five times.
I asked my mom for advice and she told me to just give my wife some time and it was probably just her hormones. My parents say I am not in the wrong and that I should stop apologizing, but I don’t know how to feel about that. In my eyes, I am the biggest and greediest AH who made my wife cry. AITA?
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
NTA. Get her a gift for "50 First Dates" since she can't seem to remember you've asked her not to get you this. 🤣
OP-NTA. Your wife, hormones or not, is being manipulative and abusive with the locking herself in the bedroom, the silent treatment, the no acknowledgement of your apologies. You are not the biggest AH for the crying, she is being very childish, selfish, and yes the silence is abusive.
You have already told her for years now you were over the Waterboy stuff, she seems to be being passive aggressive by continuing to give you that stuff. Maybe she'll start talking if you say , "We obviously need marriage counseling to work through this". Follow through on that. Good luck OP.
Can we circle back to getting up four times a night for water? I don’t want to play Internet doctor, but isn’t that like a warning sign of diabetes?
I can't believe I had to scroll down this far to find this comment. OP needs to see a doctor ASAP!! NTA you've been good sport about the gag gifts for 4 years and have been telling her for 2 that you're over these gag gifts. I get that she's hormonal, but the locking herself your room and the silent treatment is OOT and makes her TA.
Also why not keep water on a table next to the bed, instead of getting up to get some?
A Yeti cup would have been the best gift ever for this dude. And he needs to get a sleep study, it's a sign of sleep apnea to do this. Unless you're 80 years old.
NTA, anyone else read threads that say prankster and immediately think AH? (Wife not op). She is just like all other "pranksters" - an AH. Shocker the joker can dish it but can't take it. Then she drags it out for 2 weeks. This woman isn't mature enough to have a child.
Stop apologising and stop worrying about laking her cry because she is manipulating you and you have nothing to apologise for. 4 years of the same terrible joke, I would have lost it years ago.
NTA. I can get her having hurt feelings, realizing you didn’t like her gift. But her reaction and weeks of silent treatment is way over the top, and pretty immature.