'AITA for telling my boyfriend he can't keep using my homemade hot sauce anymore because I literally can't make enough?'
"AITA for telling my boyfriend he can't keep using my homemade hot sauce anymore because I literally cant make enough?"
I got really into making hot sauce from scratch a few months ago. Like growing my own peppers fermenting them the whole process. Its become my thing and honestly its therapeutic for me especially since Ive been home recovering from a surgery.
One day I made a batch and my boyfriend tried it on his eggs and lost his mind. Said it was the best thing hes ever tasted. Started calling it crack sauce. Which ok fine thats funny.
But then it became a DAILY thing. Every single meal he wants my hot sauce on it. Eggs. Rice. Pizza. Sandwiches. Ive seen this man put it on a granola bar. He goes through it so fast I cant keep up.
The problem is I grow the peppers myself on my little balcony garden and the plants only produce so much. The fermentation process takes weeks. Each batch makes maybe two bottles and hes going through a bottle every four or five days. I also started selling a few bottles to friends and coworkers for some extra income while Im not working and that money actually matters to me right now.
I told him I need to cut him off from the daily supply because I cant keep up with his consumption AND sell enough to make it worth my time. I said he can have some but not unlimited access to every batch I make.
He took it SO personally. Hes not mad exactly but every morning he makes this big show of putting store bought hot sauce on his food and going mmm this is fine I guess. Then he'll look at me all sad like a kid who got told no dessert. Yesterday he said the store stuff tastes like spicy ketchup and disappointment.
Its funny but also kind of annoying because I feel guilty every time I see him moping over his eggs. But also I literally cannot produce enough for him to drown every meal in it AND have any left to sell.
Parenthood makes you weird but apparently hot sauce makes you weirder.
AITA for cutting off his unlimited supply?
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
NTA. Sure, it's nice that he enjoys it but he's ignoring that you're doing this as a bit of an income stream, that it's time, cost and labour-intensive. Tell him you'll teach him how to make it for himself WHEN he grows and buys peppers of his own from scratch. But until then, he can buy a bottle off you like everyone else so that he learns to respect it as a product and not as as a relationship perk.
The man has time and is not handicapped by anything right? If OP can grow it and make it...so can he. If he likes it that much he can get learning. NTA OP.
ETA: I find it hilarious everytime I read the men-condemning comments below. I am a man by the way. All those comment don't apply to me. And no one should say "you are the minority". The comments are about men...not some men. Lol.
This man is mourning hot sauce like he lost a loved one the dramatic sighing over store bought is killing me.
"Every morning he makes this big show of putting store bought hot sauce on his food."
This is childish behavior. He does not deserve one more teaspoon of your sauce unless he purchases it a retail prices. You need a partner that supports your entrepreneurial goals. You can do better. Consider your goals. You need a plan to scale up your business.
Notice how he will buy the store bought and use it… and yet is seemingly clueless to the value of the sauce that he would prefer? He expects better than what he pays for … for free… and in such quantity it hurts the incentive for OP to even continue to produce it.
He might be slugging her stuff to thwart her as well. Cuz if he was serious he’d be smart enough to know offering to pay so she could keep her hustle going. (And him in his beloved hot sauce) makes sense. Or does hot sauce taste better when you know you’re leeching of your romantic partner?
NTA tell him to get some pepper plants and nurture them and you will teach him to make the sauce for himself. If he wants to use store bought peppers let him. See if they taste the same to him and then teach him to make it or ask him to help you prep his Sauce. Maybe make a few special labels for his bottles.
NTA He’s being manipulative and a little disrespectful. His inability to delay gratification would be concerning to me because I’ll bet it comes up in other aspects of life. I wonder if he has ADHD, because it’s a common trait. I’d use some store bought peppers and make his own supply, and bet he would not be able to tell the difference.
Start charging him. Sell it to him instead of your friends. Or, you know, break up with this guy who is SO inconsiderate of your time and effort? What else will he guilt you about when you won’t spend hours or days of effort on something that only benefits him?
NTA He can buy you the rignt type of peppers or he can help you grow more (for the long run). It’s wonderful he lives your sauce but he needs to realize the effort put into making it.
Looks at you sad, like those puppy eyes? You didn't cut him off, just a few drops, that's reasonable. Now you're making me want some! I had a plumber who made his own hot salsa, your post is making me miss my supply of his salsa. NTA.