Bride bans 'best friend' and ex-Maid of Honor 3 weeks before the wedding. AITA?
"AITA for uninviting my 'best friend' from my wedding 3 weeks before the event?"
I (31f) have known and been friends with my best friend (32f) for 10 years. My fiance had proposed to me last year, and my best friend was set to be my MOH for the wedding. However, two months into the wedding preparations, I found out that my best friend had been having physical and romantic relationships with my ex-boyfriend.
(The man I was dating prior to my fiance). I had dated my ex-boyfriend for about 2 years and throughout those two years she had been cheating with him. Things got a bit heated between me and her after that, but we were able to cool it down after she apologized, things were still tense, but I decided I didn't want to lose my best friend over a guy.
I was still recovering from the shock of finding out what she had been doing behind my back, so I decided to demote her from MOH (and replace her with my sister). My best friend was still going to attend as a guest. She was upset at this, but accepted.
I thought things were good, but, last week, I found out she was talking behind my back and saying unpleasant things (she was calling me ungrateful, a b, mean, bratty, and other immature names). I flipped out and uninvited her from the wedding immediately.
The wedding was only three weeks away at the time I uninvited her, so she said I messed up all of her plans by doing so. I do feel bad that it was so abrupt, but I didn't feel comfortable seeing her on what is supposed to be my happiest day anymore.
The wedding is on a weekend and the venue is 2 hours away from her house, so she didn't have to take a vacation to attend or anything like that, but I know cutting her out so close to the date was not the nicest move. AITA?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Calm-Kaleidoscope204 said:
NTA. She isn't worth calling a friend. Friends don't sleep with their besties' boyfriends and don't trash talk their pals behind their backs. Good riddance!
CleanPerspective2345 said:
NTA. Your wedding day is about you and your happiness. You shouldn't have to be around someone who betrayed you and badmouthed you.
Becalmandkind said:
NTA. You are justifiably concerned about drama and negative behavior at YOUR wedding. It’s not about her plans. She can cope. Don’t give it another thought.
CrabbiestAsp said:
NTA. This person is not your friend. It's funny how she expects you to worry about her weekend plans being messed up now she not invited, but she wasn't worried about destroying your entire relationship by sleeping with your boyfriend at the time. F that.
amhfrison said:
NTA. Enjoy your day without the drama and stress your ex-friend would bring (intentionally or not).
InternationalCard624 said:
NTA, but stop calling this person your best friend. She is not your friend, if she was she wouldn't have hooked up with your ex while you were with him. She betrayed you as much as he did.
Cultural-Camp5793 said:
NTA, but you shouldn't have allowed her back in your life. She cheated with your ex boyfriend! She isn't trustworthy or friend material. She betrayed you! She is not your friend. She is badmouthing you and you let her back in. Please end this friendship, you'll feel so much better in life.