'AITA for embarrassing my MIL in front of a co-worker she hates?'
"AITA for embarrassing my MIL in front of a co-worker she hates?"
My fiance's mom is the worst. She thinks she is a princess and we should all just bow down, and she very clearly thinks she is better than me. Don't worry he is not a mama's boy and he does his best, but we did make the mistake of accepting her generosity, so now we can't go scorched Earth when she starts up with her sh$t.
We are currently in the trenches of it, because I told her that the pale gold dress she wanted to wear was inappropriate for the mother of the groom. Ever since then she has been threatening to upstage me or to wear white.
The other night, MIL took us to dinner and started up with her sh*t again. She was "teasing" me about how she gave birth to him and should be able to wear whatever she wants and implying my dress was plain. MIL then made a face like something was wrong and when asked said "Scott" had just walked in.
For background Scott and MIL work together and do not get along. They are both very competitive and have this rivalry, and recently he felt she poached a client from him, so before she was leaving for her meeting, he poured a coffee cup filled with vodka on her. Then he was like well she can't go smelling like alcohol it's unprofessional, so he got the client back and MIL has been seething ever since.
Later in the evening MIL began "teasing" me again about the wedding so without saying anything, I got up, crossed the restaurant and approached Scott. MIL ran after me and was like don't you dare and digging her nails into my arm.
I went up to the table and said sorry to interrupt his date, but I heard he liked throwing drinks at MIL and I was wondering if he wanted to come to my wedding, and be in charge of covering in red wine if she wore anything inappropriate.
I've never seen MIL look that embarrassed, but omg her face went red and Scott burst out laughing. He said there was nothing in the world he would love more. MIL dragged me off and read me the riot act about "humiliating" and "betraying" her. Then stormed off and left us with a massive tab she had previously agreed to pay. She is still not speaking to me and telling the family how awful I am.
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Samarkand457 said:
NTA, but be prepared to foot the bills or downsize over this. I would also ask Scott to be my bridesman.
CarpeCyprinidae said:
Brilliant. NTA well done. Power dynamics need to be established, I think your power level just went up a few megawatts.
Lazuli_Rose said:
NTA. You better hand-deliver that invite because she absolutely is going to do something now. But I admire your chutzpah.
TheWanderingMedic said:
NTA, but pay for your own wedding if you want to avoid the drama.
DottedUnicorn said:
NTA. Tell her you may not invite Scott but there will be guests with red wine on hand for ANY guest who wears white and she's been fairly warned. She should ensure to bring a second non white dress if she plans to attend your wedding wearing white or any white variant (cream, champagne, light gold or yellow, etc.)
Spell it out. Tell everyone in advance. Then enjoy your wedding and just roll your eyes at her when she's wine stained. When she gets mad, remind her she was warned.
MypuppyDaisy said:
Your mistake is accepting money from her. Going forward, don’t. Owe her nothing. Life won’t be easy with her in it so be prepared. NTA.
BeardManMichael said:
NTA. Awesome work. Sounds like you reinforced the proper power hierarchy in an effective way. You put your mother-in-law right where she belongs and you did so in a very creative manner. Congrats and good luck with the wedding!