Bride FURIOUS with sister after she 'hijacks' her wedding. AITA? UPDATED 3X

"AITAH for being angry at my sister after what she did at my wedding?"

I (F30) got married last weekend, and it was supposed to be the happiest day of my life, but drama unfolded, and now my family is split in half. I need to know if I’m the a-hole or if my reaction was justified.

Backstory:

My younger sister (F27), let’s call her "Lucy," has always been the golden child of the family. She’s smart, beautiful, and has always been the center of attention, whether it’s her birthdays, graduations, or other significant life events. I’ve always felt like I was living in her shadow, but I’ve never said anything because, well… she’s my sister, and I love her.

Lucy got pregnant a couple of months ago, and while I’m genuinely happy for her, I was also relieved that my wedding day could finally be about *me* for once. No one overshadowing me. No unexpected news. Just me, my partner, and our big day.

The Incident:

A week before the wedding, Lucy called me, and during what I thought was a casual sisterly chat, she drops this bombshell: "Wouldn't it be amazing if I announced my pregnancy during your reception? It would be such a surprise!"

She went on to explain that all of our family would be there, and she thought it would be "such a special moment" for everyone.

I was stunned. I told her politely but firmly that I didn’t think it was a good idea. I had spent months planning this day, and I wanted it to be about my husband and me, not a pregnancy announcement. Lucy said I was overreacting and being selfish. She said it wasn’t a big deal, and that “everyone would be so happy.”

I reiterated my stance—NO announcement at my wedding. I thought that was the end of it.

The Day of the Wedding:

Fast forward to the reception. Everything was going beautifully. I was having the time of my life until I noticed Lucy looking a bit… smug? That’s when she tapped her glass for attention. My stomach dropped.

In front of all our guests, she stood up and announced her pregnancy anyway. The room erupted in cheers and congratulations. I was frozen in shock. It felt like a dream. People immediately swarmed her with hugs and questions, and suddenly, my wedding was no longer about *me*—it was about Lucy and her baby.

I was furious. My husband could see it, my bridesmaids could see it, and honestly, anyone paying attention could see I was upset. But I didn’t want to cause a scene, so I left the reception early, crying in the bridal suite. My husband tried to console me, but I was heartbroken.

Aftermath:

Now, here’s where things get worse. The next day, Lucy texted me saying I was “being a drama queen” and that “everyone was happy for her.” My parents are taking her side, saying I should have “just let her have her moment” and that I’m being “immature” for being upset. But a few of my cousins and friends have reached out to tell me that they thought what Lucy did was selfish and wrong.

The family is now divided. Some say I’m overreacting, while others say Lucy was out of line.

So, AITAH for getting upset that my sister hijacked my wedding to announce her pregnancy?

Before we give you OP's update, let's take a look at some top responses:

Commenter 1: NTA

Go no contact with her and anyone on her side. She needs to learn her actions have consequences. Silence is your best response to all of them.

F people taking over YOUR PAID PARTY for their selfish bs.

Commenter 2: At her baby shower announced that you are pregnant even if you’re not

Commenter 3: NTA. Send her the bill for her announcement party. Explain to your parents you told her know, she did it anyway, she should pay. Save your messages and video and offer to go immediately to small claims court if she doesn’t pay.

I would even figure out how far into the reception this was done and charge her that percentage of the costs. And BLAST her on social media.

Good phrases are #goldenchild #entitled and #maincharacter let everyone know she can’t stand for anything to be about you at all, even your own wedding. Let her face the consequences or pony up the money.

gga09chap writes:

YTA? I personally don’t get it either. To each their own, of course, but I just can’t imagine getting mad if someone proposed to their significant other at my wedding. Romance is in the air at a wedding, and families are usually together, along with a bunch of friends.

If this would have happened at my wedding, be it a baby announcement or a proposal, I would congratulate the happy couple and continue on with my evening, not sulk around because an iota of attention was off of me for twenty seconds. I was too busy reveling in the fact that I had a husband, that we were married, to worry much about how much attention other people were lavishing on me.

We were paying attention to each other. I understand that she deliberately asked her sister NOT to do this, and it would have pissed me off too if someone had purposely done something that I had asked them not to do, but not to the point of letting it ruin my entire wedding night and spending it crying in the bridal suite. Like…are you even old enough to be married? You’re certainly not mature enough.

creima writes:

NTA. I worked with someone who had a sister like this. Made the pregnancy announcement at co-worker's wedding (I was there) when she was supposed to be toasting the happy couple no less. Literally said one meh nice sentiment about the couple and then right into her pregancy announcement.

The room went pretty quiet and the sister showed her great displeasure with the lack of enthusiasm. Their parents weren't happy with the lukewarm response either (preggo sister is the golden child).

Sister then was stupid enough to question (still had the mic) why my co-worker and her new husband weren't coming to congratulate her. My co-worker's husband (I love this guy) said, we just hope this baby daddy works out better than the 1st two! LOLOLOL. I thought the sister was going punch him. The whole room laughed out loud.

gfetttt writes:

NTA. Spill wine on her. I know that's normally reserved for the crime of wearing white to a wedding, but seeing as there's the stigma of alcohol well pregnant you could totally spill wine on someone and then stir the drama pot with a loud

"God you wine-o I thought you weren't supposed to drink well pregnant" just totally stomp on their attempted dream announcement it's embarrassing it pulls the rug out from under their announcement just generally ruins it.

Personally I think OP would have been smart knowing her sister is a spotlight hog to pre-announce hop onto the family group chat and "sooooo excited that my newest upcoming niece or nephew will be able to attend the wedding with sister.... It's sooooo great....

Remember everyone sister can't drink make sure she has a good sober time." Or tell the family gossip ahead of time.... Just let it slip to auntie gossip "sister is pregnant, but you have to promise you won't tell anyone I was sworn to not say anything but I'm just so excited I can't help it, but I know you're discreet"

hahajiut writes:

NTA. No means no. And by your post it doesn’t sound like your family is divided. It sounds like only your sister and your parents thought it was a good idea, whereas everyone else thinks it’s out of line.

I would respond back to everyone who disagreed: “Lucy asked me if she could announce her pregnancy on my wedding day and I specifically told her no. She could’ve announced her pregnancy any other day.

But she chose to announce her moment specifically on a special day that was meant to celebrate mine and my husband’s union. A day I specifically asked her not to. A day I spent months planning and investing into to celebrate with everyone regarding to the start of my union with my husband.

For her the day doesn’t hold any sentimental meaning. But for me that day is sentimental because I married my life partner. And for some reason she couldn’t let me have this one day for myself. It had to be shared with her.”

Update 1:

It’s me again, the one whose sister hijacked her wedding with a surprise pregnancy announcement. First of all, I just want to thank everyone who commented on my original post. I never expected it to go viral, and reading your responses really gave me some clarity. I figured I owed you all an update, especially since things have really escalated since then.

What Happened After the Wedding:

So, after the wedding, I took a few days to cool down. I didn’t want to respond to any of the family drama immediately because, honestly, I needed some space to process everything.

But Lucy and my parents kept pushing for a “resolution,” insisting that I should apologize for “storming out” of my own wedding and for “making a big deal out of nothing.”

I held firm, though. I told them how deeply hurt I was, how Lucy had completely disregarded my feelings and my boundaries. I tried to explain that it wasn’t just about the announcement—it was about years of feeling like I always came second to her.

Unsurprisingly, Lucy doubled down and kept calling me “dramatic” and “self-centered.” My parents were still on her side, repeating how “everyone was happy” and that I should “let it go.”

Update 2:

Now, here’s where things got even messier. My cousins and some extended family caught wind of what was going on (thanks, social media), and the family divide has gotten even wider.

One of my cousins actually called Lucy out publicly, saying what she did was “attention-seeking and disrespectful.” That led to a full-blown family argument in our group chat, with people picking sides. The weirdest part?

Some family members who initially didn’t say much are now telling me they’ve always seen Lucy as “the golden child” too, and they’re glad someone finally spoke up.

Of course, this didn’t go over well with my parents. My mom told me I was “tearing the family apart” and that I needed to “put an end to this nonsense.” But I wasn’t the one who made it public, and I can’t control what other people say or think.

Update 3:

What really shocked me, though, was how my dad reacted. He’s usually the peacemaker, but he straight-up told me that I “ruined” Lucy’s big moment (her pregnancy announcement) and that I’m “holding a grudge for no reason.” That hurt more than I expected because I always thought he at least understood where I was coming from.

On top of that, my parents invited Lucy and her husband over for dinner a few nights ago, but they didn’t invite me. When I asked why, my mom said they “didn’t want any more drama.” So now, not only am I dealing with the emotional fallout from the wedding, but I’m also feeling like I’m being pushed out of my own family.

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting, and honestly, I don’t think I can keep pretending everything’s okay just for the sake of keeping peace. I love my family, but I can’t keep sacrificing my feelings and self-respect just to avoid conflict. My husband has been super supportive through all of this, and he’s encouraged me to set clear boundaries with both my sister and my parents.

So, as hard as it is, I’ve decided to go low contact with Lucy and my parents for now. I’m not cutting them out completely, but I need space to heal and to figure out how (or if) I want to move forward with them. Some of my cousins have reached out to say they support me, and that’s been a huge comfort during all of this.

After my sister announced her pregnancy at my wedding despite me telling her not to, I’ve faced pressure from my family to apologize and move on. My parents have taken her side, and the family is more divided than ever. I’ve decided to go low contact with my sister and parents to protect my mental health. AITA for distancing myself after everything that happened?

Readers continued to weigh in on OP's updates:

Commenter 1: Absolutely NTA. I always hate suggesting LC or NC, but to be honest it sounds like the only option in this scenario if you wish to keep your self respect.

What Lucy did was terrible, and the way your parents are taking her side is equally horrid. I would get closer to your cousins, they seem like your real family.

OOP: Thanks for the support. I agree—low contact seems necessary to keep my self-respect. Lucy’s actions hurt, and my parents siding with her made it worse. I’ll definitely focus on my cousins who’ve been supportive. Appreciate your advice.

Commenter 2: NTA: your sister is a self centered b and your parents obviously prefer her over you. F all 3 of em and when they’re ready to take accountability then you can rekindle the relationship. Until then, ignore them and enjoy your new marriage

Commenter 3: NTA. Send her the bill for the wedding since it was her “big moment”