Bride kicks 'high fashion' sister out of her wedding, 'she didn't like my dress.' AITA?
"AITA for kicking my sister out of my wedding because she didn't like my dress?"
My (28F) wedding was last weekend, and it was supposed to be the happiest day of my life. But now, all I feel is a mix of anger and guilt, and I can’t stop replaying what happened with my sister, Emma (25F).
Let me set the scene. My fiancé, Dave (30M), and I planned a small, intimate wedding in this beautiful garden venue. Everything was perfect – at least in my head. I had chosen a simple, elegant wedding dress, not super fancy but one I absolutely loved. It wasn't traditional; it had this flowy, bohemian vibe, and I felt like a goddess in it.
The problem? Emma didn’t feel the same way. Emma is... well, she's the type of person who loves high fashion. She’s always dressed to the nines, and I admire her style, but she can be a bit opinionated about it. When I showed her my dress before the wedding, she made this face. You know the one – the "I’m trying to be polite, but I hate this" face.
I brushed it off, thinking it was just her personal taste, and we moved on. Fast forward to the wedding day. Emma arrives at the venue, and the first thing she says to me is, “Are you really going to wear that?”
I’m standing there, getting my hair done, in my robe, moments before walking down the aisle, and she’s critiquing my dress. I try to laugh it off, but she keeps going. “You know, this would have been the perfect opportunity to wear something a bit more... classy? I mean, you’re the bride. Don't you want to wow everyone?”
Her words were like a punch to the gut. I had spent months planning this day, and this was the dress I felt comfortable and beautiful in. I asked her to drop it, but she just wouldn’t let it go. Emma started suggesting other dresses I could have chosen, even saying, “I could’ve helped you find something so much better.” I lost it. I told her, “Emma, if you can’t support me today, then maybe you shouldn’t be here.”
She looked at me like I had just slapped her, and then she stormed off. I thought she was just going to cool down, but instead, she left the wedding entirely. My parents were furious with me for "ruining the family dynamic" and accused me of overreacting. They said Emma was just being Emma, and I should have let it go. Dave supports me, but I can tell he’s uncomfortable with all the family drama now.
Since then, Emma hasn’t spoken to me. My parents have been sending passive-aggressive texts about how family is more important than a dress, and now I’m questioning whether I really did overreact. I just wanted to feel special on my wedding day, and instead, I feel like I pushed my sister away over something petty. So...AITA?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Watson424242 said:
NTA. Text your parents back saying: You’re right. Family IS more important than a dress. It’s too bad Emma doesn’t understand that. Maybe if she did, she wouldn’t have repeatedly insulted my dress moments before I was set to walk down the aisle.
Maybe if she understood the importance of family, she’d have actually been supportive of me, her FAMILY. I don’t know why she’s failed to learn to be supportive of family but maybe you guys can try to teach her this.
adobeacrobatreader said:
NTA. Do not contact her. She will just invite more drama in your life. Nobody asked her to leave, and you didn't kick her out. You just told her to step off and behave. Whatever she did afterward was her choice. She should apologize to you, not the other way around.
NerdySwampWitch40 said:
NTA. If Emma is not capable of being Emma without being a raging bitch to you and tearing you down at YOUR wedding, then YOU didn't ruin the family dynamic. Emma did. You should point out to your parents that Emma is welcome to her opinions, but she needs to learn that some thoughts are inside thoughts.
You didn't ask Emma to leave your presence because of a dress. You asked her to leave because she was crass and hurtful to you. And that you don't owe her an apology for asking her to walk away.
Cybermagetx said:
Nta. And tell your parents to f off with that sh$%. She did it. Not you. They can enable her bad behavior but you wasn't gonna do it on your wedding day. And if they cant support you they can go too.
Zakatyu said:
NTA. "My parents have been sending me passive-aggresive texts about how family is more important than a dress," you can answer: "you're right, Emma should have know that being there for your sister's wedding is more important than her liking a dress she isn't even wearing, I hope she learns from this experience that not every event is about her and not everybody has the same taste in clothing."
MintJulepTestosteron said:
Family is more important than a dress. That's why she should have stfu and put you first on your wedding day. NTA.
Jealous_Art_3922 said:
Let me guess, Emma is the Golden Child? Emma is a fashion snob. She never learned that "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." You didn't ruin the family dynamic, your parents let her get away with being obnoxious her whole life, and this is what they've produced. NTA. She should have shut her trap when you asked her.