Bridesmaid causes wedding make up artist to 'walk out;' Bride is furious but bridal party backs her up. AITA?

When this bridesmaid feels like she shouldn't owe money for wedding makeup after what happened, she asks the internet:

"AITA for the makeup artist walking off as I was difficult and refusing to cover some of the cost of the MUA?"

I 26F am a bridesmaid for my friend college Lily. She wasn’t really involved in planning the wedding, leaving it to her MOH Anna apart from choosing the venue and dress.

Anna picked a local makeup artist and she experience doing the look that Lily and Anna had decided on. I first met her at the rehearsal dinner and she did Lily’s and all the bridesmaids’ makeup.

The makeup had lasted for most people, however on me it looked awful by the end of the night- the foundation had separated in places and it highlighted my texture.

When she came around to do the makeup for the wedding, I asked her if she would mind me doing my skin prep before she puts the makeup on, and she said she did her own skin prep and she didn’t want to deviate from the look Anna asked her to recreate.

I mentioned how my makeup had looked at the end of the rehearsal and that I could do my own makeup instead and she told Anna. I repeated the same information to Anna and said that I wouldn’t mind doing my own makeup, but Anna insisted that the makeup looks for us should be cohesive and just work with the MUA. Anna was quite busy so I left her alone.

When it came to my turn for the makeup, the skin prep she was talking about was was a makeup wipe and a facial mist. I asked her if I could use my moisturiser and she said no it might not work with the foundation she was using on us and when I said she could use my foundation she said no it was her professional reputation on the line so she felt more comfortable using her products.

We were just going around in circles and she wasn’t compromising on anything. One of the other bridesmaids came in and when I explained the situation to her the MUA got pissed and walked off because she felt I was now ganging up on her.

She had done everyone’s makeup barring mine and Anna’s at this point and Anna called me difficult and I told her I had tried my best to work with the MUA and the other bridesmaid backed me up.

Anna got upset as we were in a foreign place where she knew no one last minute to help with hair as the MUA had left and Anna and me didn’t have our makeup done.

Some of the other bridesmaids tried to placate the MUA, but couldn’t find her and we found out later she had just left. We all did our own hair and one of the other bridesmaids did Anna’s makeup.

Anna didn’t talk to me for the rest of the day and has sent me a text requesting me to cover some of the cost with the MUA, as she is still charging for transport and the hourly rate of the work she did do on the day.

Lily is on her honeymoon so I don’t want to bother her with this but I genuinely don’t believe I should be responsible for the makeup costs. I feel awful that on the day she walked out and I gave countless apologies, but I tried to stand my ground about the makeup and now am getting called difficult.

Let's see what readers thought:

cinderzel writes:

I have been a professional MUA until recently and this story makes no sense to me! I have had lots of clients ask me to use their own skin prep for various reasons that should not have been an issue and is so bizarre and then to leave without doing everyone’s makeup is so unprofessional.

I find this MUA’s behavior so egregious. You weren’t asking for anything out of bounds at all! I can’t imagine acting this way and then demanding $ later - unless there are missing reasons??? ‘Stand your ground’ does make it sound like you were being rude - I guess in hindsight you should have just said you will do your own makeup and not argue le with this crazy person.

This MUA has balls to leave before she’s finished then demand payment. I personally would probably pay for what your makeup would have cost to keep the peace and to not drag Lily into it but NTA

androma writes:

ESH. i'm not a professional MUA or even been in that many weddings, but i've had my makeup done a few times and i always did my own skin prep?? i don't want other people doing my skin prep. makeup is ok but i'm very picky about my actual skincare. MUA should've let you use your own skin prep imo.

you should've let it go instead of continuing to argue but MUA shouldn't have left just because of one difficult bridesmaid when there were others still waiting.

substanqu writes:

NTA. It doesn't matter who's wedding it is, it's your face. If you don't want your makeup done by someone else, then the answer is no. And, I admit, I don't get the whole 'cohesive look" for makeup. Is it wearing the same color eyeshadow and lipstick? I don't get it. No one is looking that closely at any bridesmaid.

Even in pictures, it's not going to stand out if one bridesmaid is wearing a different shade pink. You can easily buy colors to match whatever color scheme the bride is going for. I've been in several weddings.

I usually end up doing my own makeup and it lasts longer and looks better because I know my skin better than anyone and because it's my own makeup, I can touch it up as the day progresses.

The MUA was unprofessional. You needing a certain moisturizer is not undermining her expertise, and if the foundation actually separated during the rehearsal dinner, then this MUA doesn't know what she's doing. You were at a rehearsal dinner, not hiking a volcano in Maui. I wouldn't give a dime to anyone

fldsa0 writes:

Mild YTA. It's too late now but it was one day. You should have sucked it up.

I was MOH and bride decided we'd all have the same hair style. Looked fantastic on everyone else but me (I knew the moment it was suggested it wouldn't fit my face shape lol). But it was not my day (and the best man was my ex, so obviously I'd want to look my best that day.... cest la vie ). I just went ahead and made sure my best friend had HER day.

Pay for what would have been yours and Anna's makeup session. Don't involve tbe bride. Move on.

bz writes:

NTA. While I understand the MUA's concern over moisturizer and foundation because some products have chemical reactions to each other, change color, oxidize, or pill up, the correct solution would have been to go to the bride and say "Bride, your bridesmaid has requested I do X.

If I do X and she/you aren't happy with the results, I want it in writing that you won't blame me or leave bad reviews." And then just do X!

Part of being a good MUA is changing your plan for each person in your chair. Someone with eczema is going to need a very different plan than someone with oily skin, and a black client is going to need a different plan from a pale redhead.

I work in the film industry and A LOT of actresses bring their own products because they know what works on them (redheads especially) and they want to look good. The MUAs play around with the products and learn how to mix them with their own products to create a flawless finished look.

aget writes:

YTA you did everything possible to ruin that woman's day. When a PROFESSIONAL asks for your cooperation, you shut up and do as you are told. They didn't need your makeup to last for two days. They needed it to last for 2 hours while everyone took photos. Then nobody gave a shit how you looked. It wasn't your day!

The hair and makeup needed to look a certain way for the photos and the Bride and the artist had figured out, without your help, how to get the damn job done. You stressed out every bridesmaid, the MOH, and the Bride.

She was probably supposed to do the mothers of the Bride and Groom also, so well done throwing a fit and making her wedding day all about you, princess of the assholes. Just pay the makeup artist and apologize.