'AITA for bringing a meat-based product to my vegan friend's dinner?' 'I didn't think it was a RULE.'

"AITA for bringing a meat based product to my vegan friend's dinner?"

I (22F) was invited to a group dinner hosted by my friend Hannah (23F), who’s vegan. In the message she said, “It would be awesome if you all could bring plant-based dishes so everyone can try everything.” I didn't think it was a RULE, I saw it more like a suggestion.

I am from Chile and my friends love our food, so I decided to bring empanadas de pino (non-vegan) and sopaipillas con pebre, which are vegan. I made sure to put a visible tag that showed the vegan and non vegan food. (She didn't try any of the dishes I brought)

At the dinner, Hannah looked really upset and later texted me that I was really disrespectful for bringing animal products into her home. I apologized, but I also didn’t think it was a that big of a deal since I didn't force her to it and I brought a food that she could also eat.

Also, mind you, we've already eaten non-vegan food there plenty of times, so I would've never guessed it would be such a problem. AITA? (It was not a small dinner with friends, we were 27 people there and there were over 20 different dishes to choose from, with most of them being vegan.)

Here's what people had to say to OP:

DoIwantToKnow6417 said:

Your vegan friend organizes dinner and requests her friends to bring plant based dishes so everybody can try everything. You decided to bring a non vegan dish. YTA.

Enough-Process9773 said:

YTA. You knew your friend was vegan. She asked you politely to bring plant-based dishes so everyone can try everything. You decided to bring food to your friend's party that you knew your friend couldn't eat, and to ignore what she said about everyone getting to try everything. If you want to be invited back - ever - I suggest you apologize properly, acknowledge that was an AH move and you won't do it again.

ScarletNotThatOne said:

NAH. She believed she made a direct request. You believed she made a suggestion, which you accommodated nicely. This is a misunderstanding.

koifishyfishy said:

YTA. I would assume that bringing a meat dish into a vegan's home wouldn't be welcome, regardless of how the invite was worded. And if you weren't sure, a text to the host to clarify would take like 5 seconds. I wouldn't bring wine or beer, for example, to the home of a recovering alcoholic just because the invite didn't specifically say not to. Know your host and plan accordingly.

Edited to add: It's possible that those previous times that people brought meat did actually bother the host and that's why she specified, albeit not as clearly as she should have, to bring plant-based food. For those who don't like the alcohol analogy, someone suggested the analogy that you wouldn't bring pork to a dinner at a Jewish household.

Old_Cheek1076 said:

YTA - Seems pretty clear what she was asking for. You couldn’t go one meal without meat?

CandylandCanada said:

NTA. Hannah's diction is the problem. She should have written "Please ensure that all dishes are vegan so that everyone can enjoy!" By using "it would be awesome" and "plant-based dishes", she wasn't specific enough. Some dishes *are* primarily plant-based, but neither vegan nor vegetarian.

The connotation of "It would be awesome" is that something would be good, but there's no mandatory element, hence the conditional verb tense. Hannah failed to clearly communicate that she wanted all dishes to be vegan. That's on her.