Man explains bizarre relationship to his sister; 'Our dynamic works for us after all we've been through.''

When this man wants to explain his relationship to his sister, he tells the internet:

"My sister means so much to me."

I am 29, she's 27. Since we were born, we've been attached at the hip. We shared a bedroom until I became a teenager, we went through an abusive childhood together and protected each other at home and at school, and always had each other's backs.

When her first boyfriend cheated on her, I kicked his ass. When my first serious girlfriend moved to another state, she held me while I cried every night for a week. When we were texting and I had a bad day, she'd cook my favorite meals for me and vice versa. Our parents were barely there, and we really depended on each other.

I moved to another city when I was 18, with the plan that she could move in with me as soon as I got settled and had a good environment for her to finish highschool and live in relative comfort.

My parents found out though and essentially ended her freedom. She was forced to get a job because they quit buying food or clothes or any other basics and she needed to get a part time job just to stay alive. She would leave at 7 in the morning and come back at 10 at night most nights.

I was terribly depressed, living in a 2 bedroom apartment with no furniture, barely any clothing, no friends, a dead end job and no food because I was sending her all my extra money so she could work less hours and do her homework.

One day one of her teachers that she was close with came to her house looking for her because of our parents keeping her at home, and I could write a novel about everything that happened there, but suffice it to say that she got out of that situation and came to live with me.

She did absolutely everything to pay me back. Saved up the money I was giving her for lunches and bought us furniture from thrift shops, decorated the house with crafts she made, got a part time job to increase our income while I put myself through audio engineer college etc.

It was the turning point of my life where I knew things were going to be okay. She graduated and had a healthy friend group. I was so happy to see her succeed, and she supported me in my new career in a field I love.

She spent more time at home due to no school and less work. She started taking on more of a home role and just trying to make my life as easy as possible while I worked 50-60 hour weeks on my passion/career.

As we've gotten older we've not really changed that much. We are both heavily introverted, we both work for a living, and there's been less than a year in our whole lives where we haven't lived together.

I don't really know what else to say. We understand and love each other and I'm pretty sure it'll always be this way. I know people will be critical, and all I can say to that is: that's fine.

We're planning on buying a house together, but with an upper and lower suite in case we ever get serious with a partner. Life is good. We are extremely content with how things are, and we're happy.

Let's see what readers had to say:

felin writes:

My dad lived with his brother and one of his sisters in a big house. They're all divorced with no children at home. When my uncle had a stroke, my dad found him on the floor and took him to the hospital. He still ended up dying two months later, but he had that extra two months that he wouldn't have had if he lived alone.

My grandma, my dad's other sister, and my cousin live in a triplex together, and they have for ages. My dad lived there too (and my cousin lives in his old apartment) when my parents separated (when I was in college).

It's great to live with family, whether it's your parents, siblings, spouse+children, or chosen family. That is, as long as you can stand them. I love my mom, but I could never live with her. I don't know how my brother does it.

On my mom's side, no one likes each other, but once my aunt, her three grown daughters, my other aunt, her school-age daughter, and my uncle all lived in a small, two-bedroom apartment and no one could stand anyone else in there. It was chaos.

fake6 writes:

No judgement whatsoever. Sounds like you have a best friend built into a sibling. Nothing wrong with that. If you can get a place with separate living spaces, that would be cool.

The only question I would have would be is if you’re prepared to give that up if either one of you found a spouse that didn’t want to live there. Suppose you could always rent your share out she could do the same.

If you’re really worried about it, you could always do some therapy with her to figure things out.

faagn writes:

My Sister and I have a relationship that mirror yours. Like you we live together, in fact the biggest difference is that we are in our early 50s. We also had a rough childhood and early adult life. We have always had each other’s backs.