Couple on a budget serves 2 types of cake at wedding, family is 'unnecessarily mean.'

Planning a wedding is an expensive project, and while many couples attempt to cut costs everywhere they can, there are some budget hacks that might be a bit too obvious...

It turns out that your guests will notice if you serve a better cake to immediate family and a grocery store bakery pre-packaged sheet cake to the people who barely made the invitation cut. So, when a frustrated bride decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit's 'Am I the As*hole' about whether or not she was wrong to serve the 'fancy' cake only for the fancy guests, people were eager to help deem a verdict.

AITA (Am I the As*hole) for offering two different kinds of cake at our wedding?

My husband, Josh (29F) and I (27F) just had our wedding a couple weeks ago and we mostly got good feedback until today we have heard that a lot of people have been smack talking the cake behind our backs.

Josh and I originally were going to have a smaller wedding at a resort. We were fortunate enough to be given some money to invite extra guests, so we decided to expand the wedding and have some of our second cousins and their kids, and some friends that we otherwise don’t get to see as often.

We are on a budget, so we decided to keep the “fancy” cake (the cutting cake for the pictures, not the real cake) for immediate family and the pastor and a few members of the wedding party that we have known for the longest. We gave them the cake in boxes to take home though so they wouldn’t be eating it in front of everyone else.

(Minus the pastor because he flew out from a ways and he is vegan so he couldn’t eat the dinner and we wanted him to have something to eat before it got too late.) We got a couple sheet cakes.

One was vanilla and buttercream with rosettes and then there was another sheet cake of pineapple chocolate chunk especially for Josh’s side of the family (because they spend a lot of time in Florida).

We found out from talking with family that there was a lot of full slices left behind on people’s plates of the pineapple cake. (Which the servers would not take home with them, so we noticed you can see it in a lot of the pictures.) We were having too much fun to notice at the time, we loved catching up with all our guests!

Apparently Josh’s family did not like the cake like we thought they would and there have been some unkind words behind our backs. We got a text from Josh’s uncle that wasn’t meant for us to see and it really stung.

We are unsure where to go from here and what to say. The cake did not go off like we hope but we think they are being unnecessarily mean. (By the way, there was a full dinner, three kinds of cheese— even Monterey Jack— available, and an open bar that didn’t close until late. So!) I feel like we were pretty good to our guests on a shoestring budget

3 kinds of cheese--even Monterey Jack--and this level of disrespect from the pineapple-hating Florida-frequenting fam? Is it a known fact that people who often visit the sunshine state love sheet cake with pineapple chunks?

Of course, the jury of internet strangers was ready to weigh in on this dessert disaster. Here's what people had to say...

swishystrawberry said:

NTA (Not the As*hole), but I'm a bit confused as to what Josh's family 'spending a lot of time in Florida' has to do with deciding to have a pineapple chocolate cake. I lived in Florida for almost a decade, and I can tell you with complete confidence that there is zero connotation between Florida and pineapples.

I think you're confusing Florida with Hawaii.... lol. But beyond that, the combo of pineapple and chocolate just sounds yucky, and I think that's likely what people are speculating on. Honestly, I wouldn't sweat it. Everyone will forget about it shortly, I'm sure. What matters is if you enjoyed your wedding.

UpsilonAndromedae said:

From now on whenever anything is extra fancy I’m going to say “they even had Monterey Jack.”

ContentedRecluse said:

I was born in FL. I don't get the cake with chocolate and pineapple either. Never seen it in 50 years. What a way to ruin a chocolate cake.

Some people, however, simpy could not move on from the 'fancy' cheese detail...

agent_scurd said:

Personally I'm still stuck on the cheese comment.

SneakySneakySquirrel said:

I really want to know what the other 2 cheeses were, considering that they are less fancy and exciting than Monterey Jack. I’m thinking maybe that prepacked cheese and crackers snack with the tiny red plastic stick for spreading the cheese.

sangriaflygirl said:

Same. Of all the cheeses one can highlight as their 'we could even afford THIS cheese'... why would one select an American cheese that's most commonly used in grilled cheese or as a peppered hybrid? I mean, brie was sitting right there and you can [usually] get it at the same place! NTA but that cracked me up.

So, there you have it!

While most people agreed that this bride wasn't wrong to have a small cake for show and sheet cakes to serve, many people demanded answers on the cheese and Florida pineapple connection. Good luck, everyone (R.I.P. pineapple sheet cake).