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Man upset woman refused to teach his special needs child about breastfeeding. AITA?

Man upset woman refused to teach his special needs child about breastfeeding. AITA?


Parenting your children is usually a job for the adults in that child's life—parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles, sometimes even close family friends. However, most parents abide by the laws of stranger danger. There is no expectation of strangers to do anything with your child besides be polite and leave them alone.

On a popular Reddit thread in the Am I the A**hole Subreddit, one dad expects others around him to help explain things to his daughter, which his girlfriend finds ridiculous.

"AITA for telling my boyfriend its not a random woman's job to educate his child?"

My boyfriend has a special needs daughter. She's on the spectrum. One day, they were in a fast food place when a new baby started crying. The crying made his daughter cry. His daughter is nonverbal, developmentally delayed, and has sensory issues, including noise. Anyway, when his daughter started to cry, he went around the corner to where the crying was coming from.

A new mom was tucked in a corner, trying to nurse her new baby. He brought his daughter up to the woman and baby and said, 'See, the baby is fine,' but his daughter's crying got louder. He asked the already visibly stressed woman to explain why the baby was crying to his daughter and noted she was autistic. The woman was hesitant but explained the baby was just hungry.

His daughter continued to scream while the baby continued to scream. All around a very stressful situation for everyone involved. My boyfriend continued to stand there and asked the woman if it was OK that they hang around until the baby stopped crying so he could show his daughter that the baby was OK.

The woman refused. He got upset and stressed that his daughter just wanted to ensure the baby was OK. When he told me about the incident, I stared in disbelief. I asked if he didn't think the woman was stressed enough without him hanging over her like that.

He told me that he thinks the lady should have been more accommodating towards his daughter because she has special needs. That's when I said it wasn't that woman's job to educate his child and that he had crossed a line. He thinks I'm being inconsiderate and insensitive.

I don't feel I am, I think he was insensitive towards the woman and her new baby, and I feel he's entitled to believe the woman should have taken the time and allowed them to stand there and watch her nurse when she was trying to hide from people.

I also think it's weird he asked if they could watch so she could learn. If a man asked me that, I'd think he was a pervert using his kid as a thinly veiled excuse to watch me.

The internet is aware of the situation and is chiming in.

HandrewJobert says:

NTA (Not the A**hole). Your boyfriend should have removed his daughter from the situation instead of hassling a stranger.

TopAd7154 says:

NTA. Your boyfriend is an entitled AH. That poor woman. He probably ruined her day. Sorry, but I'd have been a lot less polite.

crazzymomof5boyzz says:

Oh, hell no! You are NTA! That poor woman. She most definitely thought your boyfriend was a creep. She's a brand new mom, awkwardly trying to nurse her infant in public, and your pervert bf was not only trying to watch but making his daughter watch as well. Is the daughter capable of understanding nursing?

ChiefTuk says:

Are you sure your boyfriend isn't on the spectrum himself? That's a complete misunderstanding of what would be socially unacceptable and a bigger failure to pick up on her emotional cues that he was making her extremely uncomfortable. His child isn't exempt from giving a nursing mother some privacy. He needs to figure out a better response to his daughter being set off by crying babies than this.

OP responded:

I've honestly considered if he was on the spectrum himself because of little things here and there, but he's explained to me before he expects people to be more accommodating with his child and her needs and wants. I say to a degree, yes, but not at the expense of their comfort and privacy.

You're not wrong, OP! Have you ever told your boyfriend the world doesn't revolve around him?

Sources: Reddit
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