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Dad refuses to pay for daughter's wedding after brother that stole his GF is invited.

Dad refuses to pay for daughter's wedding after brother that stole his GF is invited.

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Getting cheated on is rough. It's even worse when your partner cheats with someone from your family. On a popular Reddit thread on the Am I the A**hole Subreddit, a dad proves that sometimes time doesn't heal all wounds.

AITA for not paying for my daughter's wedding because she invited my brother and his family

I thought my brother was an a**hole for eating my leftover Chinese takeout.

I'm 46M, and my brother 48M. When I was 20, my then-girlfriend cheated with my brother. I was heartbroken and pissed. I told him he was no longer my brother.

OP is a fan of banishment.

Despite my request, my family didn't cut him off, so I told them I would never again be in the same place as him. If they wish to invite us both, they should invite him, as I am the one giving the ultimatum.

Your family really likes your brother.

My daughter is getting married in the spring of next year. In our culture, both parents pay for the wedding 50/50. Unexpectedly, my daughter sat me down and told me she would invite my brother and his family(he married my cheating ex). Apparently, she had been seeing them for the last four years and had built a relationship behind my back. She even wants her cousin to be a flower girl.

OP will cling to the past all he wants.

I was pissed. I told her my boundaries, and if my brother were invited, I would not pay for my part of the wedding. She became angry and told me its time to let go of the past. I told her it was not her call to make.

We argued some more, and she told me I was making her wedding about myself. I told her I would probably not even attend so that it would be all about her. She left crying.

Seems like the only one being banished is you, OP.

My ex-wife called me screaming and told me I was a huge AH, and our daughter was crushed. Then my parents called, and the same thing happened. I told them off, and now I'm ignoring their calls. My GF told me to reconsider and apologize. I will break my relationship with my daughter by not paying and attending. I don't know. I think my boundaries should be respected. Am I an a**hole for that?

AsuraRathalos says:

NTA (Not the A**hole) all the way.

This is one of those stories where your daughter has decided that she's willing to alienate you for someone that betrayed your trust. It doesn't matter if it was 20 years ago; it only matters that it happened, which means she betrayed your trust. If she wants him there so bad, he can pay half.

Also, It's ok that she has a relationship, it's ok that she wants her cousin in it, and it's not ok that she wants you to pay (half) for her wedding so a person that truly hurt you can participate as well.

While I fully support you standing your ground, just remember, if you stand here, you will miss out on her potential kids, birthday parties, and other family events because your fam will truly cut you off. If you're ok with that, do so.

EnvironmentalPhase21 says:

Y’all are wild in these comments. If this is real, I’d love to see some of you play happy family with your cheating brother and ex

themichaelkemp says:

Here’s a very unpopular NTA. I don’t understand why your daughter decided to connect with somebody who betrayed their father. How much drama would’ve it been to let sleeping dogs lie? I know a lot of people would’ve gotten over this betrayal, but you’re entitled to your feelings.

Still, if this causes an irreparable rift between you and your daughter, being right won’t give you much comfort

OP, you can do whatever you want, but if you go down this road, you're the only one being banished from the family.

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