'AITA for cutting off my dads side for giving me just 40$ for my birthday - while my brothers go on an expensive trip to Germany?'
"AITA for cutting off my dads side for giving me just 40$ for my birthday - while my brothers go on an expensive trip to Germany?"
Hello all. I'm 27, currently living with my mom. I'm a student who is struggling financially. I need to minimize working, so that I can primarily focus on my studies and get my career started. I need at least a few thousand saved to be able to put 100% effort into my studies.
I feel "stuck" wasting time working pointless jobs, when I should be spending this energy towards building my actual career. So ideally, I'd like to take my classes while working much less.
My birthday was about 3 months ago. Now - I wasn't expecting much from my dads side - they hadn't made a big deal out of it since I was 18 - which is fine by me. So when I saw they had only sent me $40 for my birthday, I wasn't TOO upset. I figured perhaps they just aren't doing well financially at the moment and that's all they could afford.
Here comes what feels like a slap in the face. I talked to my dad a few weeks ago, and turns out my two brothers (21 and 22) and step-mom are going on a vacation to GERMANY. A trip that costs thousands upon thousands of dollars.
They didn't bother inviting me, by the way. So you're telling me they could only afford to give me $40 on my birthday, but can also afford thousands on my other brothers to go ON VACATION?
I need money for school and my future, but apparently a trip to Germany is more important to them. It feels so unbalanced/unfair. they spend crazy money on vacations for my brothers, but can barley support me at all. This isn't the first time this has happened, by the way.
This makes me want to go extremely low, or straight up no contact with my dads side. I am thinking about skipping the Thanksgiving visit, because all they're gonna do is talk about their expensive trip to Germany while i'm here struggling to afford classes for my future.
I know I'm not entitled to their money or their help - but it feels disrespectful that I only got $40 while my brothers got a trip worth thousands of dollars.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Stuck wasting time working pointless jobs? So in other words, you’re squatting at Moms. Got it.
What’s the story of why you’re at home/in school at 27? Are you working on a post graduate degree?
I don’t think this is about disrespect. Nobody is entitled to anyone’s help or money, even from family. That’s just reality. You’re still in college and nearly 30, and it comes across like you’re expecting handouts. What have you been doing since you were 18? Living at home should’ve made it possible to save at least something.
What’s the full story here? Because if things are exactly as you’ve described them, then honestly, it might be time for a reality check. And look, when you get to wherever you want to be in your career/ college, without relying on anyone else, it’ll feel so much better.
Something is not adding up. You are 27.
Are they your real brothers? Or step brothers?
So it sounds like they were very generous to an adult child not related to them, while being more generous to their biological relatives. You are damn near 30. Grow TF up. I wouldn't give a person your age anything if you weren't related to me.