Everyone loves a good prank. There are shows that are built off of good pranks. Whipped cream in a hand while someone is sleeping, putting a small table over someone sleeping, hitting an air horn, or replacing sugar with salt are all classic harmless pranks. Some people don't understand when a joke is too much.
The mother writes:
I(49F) have a daughter 'Susan' (21F), who was hospitalized for an extreme medical emergency late last month. Susan was there for four days; I visited every day until the last, which happened to be on April 1st. Her roommate and other friends also visited.
On the 1st, her roommate called me crying, saying that Susan's condition suddenly worsened, and she passed on. In hindsight, I should have thought something was up but hearing that at the moment turned me into a sobbing wreck. About a half hour later, Susan and her roommate came into my house and shouted, 'April fools!'
She was allowed to leave the hospital, and that was how she decided to tell me. I did not know it could be so relieved and pissed simultaneously. I called this joke horrible, screamed at her, and told her she was NOT welcome in my house for the foreseeable future.
Susan thought Easter would be an exception. I was hosting this year with a few relatives, and she came in(she still has a key). I made her give it back and once again told her to get the hell out of my house, and while she persisted and was very stubborn about it, she finally left crying. The rest of the gathering was understandably awkward.
It's not like I will never forgive her or that I'm going no contact or anything like that, but I am just too hurt and angry to speak or look at her right now to discuss what happened. She tried to call and text me daily, but I ignored most of them.
Our family is split between acknowledging that there are consequences for this, while several others say I need to move on and forgive her because she still hasn't fully recovered and needs my support.
I get that, but I think she is getting plenty of support from other people right now for me to be a necessity, and if she wanted my help, she would not do something so damn cruel.
She was always a bit of a jokester but never like this, it does not sit right with me to just let bygones be bygones right now, but some relatives, including my parents, say I should. I hope to get some unbiased opinions on this.
The internet will give their unbiased opinion.
NTA (Not the A**hole). Some jokes just shouldn't be made. Telling a parent their child is dead is going too far, and she needs to acknowledge that.
NTA. This is not a prank. You were told your daughter was dead. You went to deal with the worst thing a parent can do, and this was supposed to be funny? A prank should not hurt someone or cause emotional distress.
I have had someone in my life fake their death, and I will never forgive them. I will never trust them. You don't prank with life and death.
A prank is matching the thread of your shirt, using a sewing needle to get the thread to stick out the edge of the shirt, and asking someone to pull it, but because the thread is actually on a spool, it just keeps coming and coming. That's a prank. This is emotional abuse.
There's zero justification for this. It's one of those things where you should talk to a therapist for recovery because this is a maximum-level betrayal. If you let them in your life at all is a complicated process, but you are so far from the a**hole in this that you may be the mouth.
NTA. But you do need to put a time frame on this punishment/consequence. Otherwise, it does seem like you're being unforgiving and that you're going no contact with her.
This was not a prank. This was cruel and unusual punishment.