'AITA for backing out at the 'last minute' because I didn’t want to sleep on an air mattress?'
"AITA for backing out at the 'last minute' because I didn’t want to sleep on an air mattress?"
I (27F) and three friends made a last minute plan to go to the mountains this weekend. Our group is a couple, let’s call them Jay (27F) and Sam (32F) and two single friends, me and Alex (26M).
We actually found a good Airbnb at first. It had two bedrooms, one with a king bed, and one with two single beds. Alex and I were totally fine sharing the second room as long as we had our own bed. But Jay kept saying that she wanted a pool.
This is a short, two day trip and we’re staying just one night. I really didn’t see why a pool was a big deal. We kept going back and forth trying to decide and the place got booked by someone else.
After that, the only places we could find had just one bedroom, a pull out couch, and an air mattress. Alex is recovering from an injury, so of course he shouldn’t be on the air mattress. The couple immediately said they wanted the bedroom, but they’re not offering to pay more for it. That leaves me with the air mattress.
Jay and Sam both don’t have a driver’s license, and Alex can’t drive right now because of his injury. So I’m the only one who can drive us there and back. On top of that, I’m also the only one who has to work on Monday.
I really don’t want to be the one driving for hours, sleeping on an air mattress, and then dragging myself to work the next day all tired and sore. I genuinely hate sleeping on an air mattress! I always sleep like garbage and it just hurts my neck.
So, I told them I was backing out. I told them that if they really want to do a trip like this, they need to plan it better so that everyone is comfortable. Alex and Sam seemed to understand, but Jay got annoyed.
She said I was being a party pooper, that I was being selfish, and that I was ruining the weekend. She told me I should just adjust so we could all have fun. For a moment, I really did think I was overreacting cause it’s just one night, and going to the mountains would be super fun.
But honestly, it doesn’t feel fair that I have the worst sleeping arrangement, and still get labeled as the problem. So, AITA for backing out “last minute” because I didn’t want to sleep on an air mattress?
Here is what readers had to say in response to the OP’s post:
Thats legit terrible. Everyone pays the same price but you get the worst bed option and are the designated driver? Nah. They’re just mad because they can’t do any of this without you, but not appreciating the extra effort on your part. NTA.
Have them sleep on the air mattress, you get the bed. Seems only fair since you are driving and have to work Monday.
NTA - perfectly reasonable to want an actual bed when youre paying for it.
NTA. Jay was the party pooper demanding somewhere with a pool instead of accepting somewhere that everybody has an actual bed.
They weren't going to pitch in for gas, either, were they? The 2 people who cant drive, trying to call the shots on a road trip is low key hilarious. Tell them to either quit being bums, or to quit being selfish pricks.
NTA. Jay thought it was more important for her to have a pool than for you to have a bed. That shows what kind of person they are. And on top of that to call you the selfish one!
Jay ruined the plans. Remind her you all had beds before she demanded a pool. You were clear from the beginning about wanting a bed. NTA.
NTA. I’d just laugh and say “no, being selfish is demanding a pool and then demanding that you be the one to sleep in an actual bed with no consideration to the other people also going on the trip.”
NTA. Your comfort matters just as much as theirs. Remember, lack of planning on their part doesn't constitute an emergency on yours.
It’s cute that your selfish friend is calling other people selfish because they won’t treat her like a princess at their expense. And by cute I mean pathetic.
If she wants you there so bad so you can drive them all there just tell them the bedroom is yours full stop. If she can't "adjust" then back out as planned. No adult enjoys sleeping on an air mattress and Jay knows this which is why she's fine with it when it's not her sleeping on it. Watch how fast those feelings change when you inform her thats where she'll be sleeping or you won't be coming.
NTA I had a “friend” who insisted we drive 3 hours to a show and back the same night, didn’t want to stay an extra day or two to do things in that city and make the drive worth it for me, which we’d initially discussed when I agreed to the trip. We definitely had to take my car. I backed out and I’m so glad I did; I felt pretty used honestly because she expected that I’d do that. You’ll be so relieved you backed out.
NTA. The one who caused the beds to be lost with their insistence of a pool. Forfeits the right to the only bed. They can share the air mattress. If there is only one bed. It goes to the driver or the injured.
NTA. Jay insisted on a pool, which created terrible sleeping arrangements, so she should get the air mattress. I skipped a family reunion because I was going to have to sleep on the couch because I was a single adult. The couples and children were given real beds. Nope! See ya.