'AITA for telling my sister to stop being a child and get a life?'
"AITA for telling my sister to stop being a child and get a life?"
I (37F) am a GP, General Practitioner. It is a firm rule of mine that I do not handle any medical situations for family and friends outside of extreme emergencies as we are supposed to avoid any medical treatment for those close to us. Normally I can stick to this rule which is a good thing, means no emergencies have happened!
However this morning my cousin called me worried about if she should take her three month old son to the hospital, not wanting to go if it was nothing and while I'd normally tell her to play it safe, I live a couple of minutes away so I just drove over. He was fine, he just has a cold I instructed her on how to care for him and what signs to look out for.
This made the rounds in the family as she posted it on Facebook laughing about her earlier worry and my older sister saw it. She called me and began to berate me about how I was fine going to help our cousin but when her 8-year-old daughter's throat was sore and she had a fever I didn't go check and help.
I pointed out that I'd brought my niece books and visited her but no I didn't medically check her as she's not a baby and my sister is definitely not a concerned new parent. My sister, being the understanding and patient woman that she is, told me that it was the principle of the matter and it showed that I didn't care for my niece.
I told her to stop being a child and if nothing else this showed how much I do care for my niece, I then told my sister she is acting like a bigger baby than our cousins son and she needed to get a life.
I feel bad for snapping like this but I hate how she questioned if I care for my niece, because I adore that girl, the two situations to my mind are very different but perhaps I should have been more patient all the same.
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
faulty_rainbow said:
NTA. An 8-yo kid can tell the parent exactly where it hurts, they go to school and can write and do basic math for god's sake. A 3-month-old can't do any of that, they can't even tell you if it hurts anywhere they only communicate with crying.
You did the right thing for showing up for cousin. Do I guess right when I think this was not the first time family had tried to wrangle you into treating them...?
Oh you absolutely guess right, despite the clear ethical rules surrounding this they still seem to think I should come running to treat every sniffle and booboo.
Unless someone is severely injured in front of me or I think there is a clear medical risk i'm not about to even suggest over the counter medication. I just say they need to talk to their own GP's about this or their pharmacist who can guide to over the counter treatment.
retrodreqms said:
NTA. Someone's 8 year old having a sore throat is obviously not an emergency. A new parent worried about the health of their newborn could be. You did the right thing, and I don't blame you for snapping. If my sister told me I don't love her child because she got her feelings hurt that I'm not at her beck and call, I would snap too.
Liu1845 said:
Let's see, an 8 year old with a sore throat compared to an infant with a cold. A cold probably causing a fever and obstructed, labored breathing. NTA.
EredditerAllTheWay said:
NTA but your cousin is for posting about it on Facebook.
Intelligent_Wind3299 said:
NTA. you have your rules/medical ethics to abide by.
Best_Baker_Ever said:
NTA. There's an obvious and clear difference between the infant and an 8 year old. That your sister cannot accept makes her entitled.