'AITA for excluding our Best Man’s girlfriend the night before our wedding?'

"AITA for excluding our Best Man’s girlfriend the night before our wedding?"

I (20F) just married my husband “Gavin” (24M) last Saturday. We had 150 guests at his parents’ backyard, so planning was stressful. Gavin’s best man “Zack” (25M) has been his best friend for years and travels a lot, so I’ve always liked seeing them reconnect. Zack started dating “Mickey” about ten months ago. We had only hung out a couple of times but we were happy for them.

The issue is Mickey (24F) We’d been polite but she’d been pushy for months, asking who I was inviting, telling me not to invite certain people, trying to take over planning our joint bachelor or bachelorette trip, acting miserable during it and making my bridesmaids insecure with digs and glares. I brushed it off and told myself she had good intentions.

For the rehearsal we had our bridal party escorted down the aisle by someone they loved. Zack told both of us he’d walk with his mom. But at the rehearsal he arrived with Mickey, who “apologized” for crashing and made it obvious she would be walking with him. They’d been dating under a year, but I bit my tongue and let it slide.

That night, me and my bridesmaids planned on going to a hotel for the night, and the guys were going to the casino, clearly stated as a guys only thing. Mickey was still there. When if she was going she said “I mean, yeah.”

Gavin privately told me he didn’t want her there but I was overwhelmed and told him to speak to Zack. Zack agreed to carpool and leave her the car since his mom’s house 10 minutes away (where they were staying).

Yet when Gavin arrived at the casino Mickey and another groomsman’s girlfriend she’d invited so she “wouldn’t be alone” were there. Gavin asked what they were doing and Zack said “they’ll respect guy time.” Gavin left with another groomsman to a bar to avoid drama, but was frustrated his best man wasn’t honest.

Our wedding was blue and gold, formal attire. All bridesmaids and plus ones followed it except Mickey, who wore a short hot pink dress. Still, I let her walk Zack down the aisle.

At the end of the night Zack and Mickey came to say goodbye. I told her “no hard feelings about last night, I’m sure it was a miscommunication, I still think you’re cool.” She went OFF for 45 minutes about how I was rude to exclude her, called me a hypocrite because I’d gone to Zack’s birthday in Palm Springs (we stayed in a separate hotel, only joined dinners, and asked permission first).

She claimed she didn’t want Zack to drink and drive (he wasn’t driving, the guys carpooled, Zach didn’t drive, and multiple wives offered to pick them up). She said I “just didn’t understand” because Zack has “more to lose” at 25 due to his wealth which Gavin and I don’t have.

I replied that no one had bad intentions but it was the night before our wedding so no conversation prior sucked. She said she regretted nothing and would do it again. I looked today, she unfollowed me everywhere. Now I feel sad. I wanted us all to be friends, but I don’t think I did anything wrong. AITA?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

flowerybutterfly96 said:

Mickey is a manipulative piece of work. She has an agenda, and in her mind, you tried to muck it up. Pray that Zack takes his backbone back before it's too late. NTA.

witcher252 said:

NTA. She sounds unhinged and is probably someone you’re going to be much better off without long term. Be prepared to see less of Zack in you and your husband’s lives. At least until they break up/if they break up.

ProfeQuiroga said:

NTA, but why do you want to be friends?

MobileRub1606 said:

NTA. This all could have been solved if you or your new husband had a spine and stood up for yourselves.

WholeAd2742 said:

NTA. You were a lot more patient than she deserved. Crashing and making an obnoxious pain of herself should have led to her removal.

Only-Breadfruit-6108 said:

You didn’t want to be friends, you don’t like her. ESH.