'AITA for Firing My Sister After She Exposed Our Family’s Darkest Secrets at Work?' UPDATED 2X
"AITA for Firing My Sister After She Exposed Our Family’s Darkest Secrets at Work?"
redditor_influencer
Hi everyone,
I (28F) am the founder and CEO of a small tech company that I’ve poured my heart into over the past five years.
Six months ago, my younger sister (24F) lost her job due to downsizing. Despite our rocky relationship — we’re polar opposites — I decided to hire her. I’m introverted and value privacy; she’s extroverted and often speaks without thinking.
Initially, things went smoothly. She brought enthusiasm to the team, and I was hopeful this could strengthen our sisterly bond. However, I began noticing colleagues giving me odd looks and whispering when I wasn’t around. During a team lunch, one employee casually mentioned a deeply personal family incident, joking about it as if it were common knowledge.
I was stunned. I pulled my sister aside and asked if she’d been sharing personal family stories. She admitted she had, saying it helped her connect with others and that it was “no big deal.” I stressed that our family’s history is private and that discussing it at work was unprofessional. She brushed me off, calling me overly sensitive.
A couple of weeks later, I discovered she’d told several employees about our parents’ tumultuous divorce and even shared that our mother had struggled with substance use problems —a painful chapter we’ve worked hard to move past. This wasn’t just embarrassing; it felt like a profound betrayal.
I confronted her again, but she accused me of trying to control her and said I was letting my “CEO status” go to my head. Realizing that this was jeopardizing not only my reputation but also the company’s culture, I made the difficult decision to terminate her employment for breaching confidentiality and unprofessional conduct.
She was furious, accusing me of choosing work over family and vowing to never forgive me. Our parents are now involved and believe I overreacted. They think I should have been more understanding and given her another chance.
This whole situation has left me questioning myself. I feel guilty for firing her but also feel that I had to protect my company and personal boundaries. So, AITA for firing my sister after she exposed our family’s darkest secrets at work?
First Update:
redditor_influencer
I reached out to a friend who still works at the company where my sister was previously employed. He confirmed that she was indeed fired, but not just because of the downsizing she mentioned.
According to him, she had a knack for orchestrating gossip and creating conflicts among coworkers. She would spread rumors and stir up drama, which led to a toxic work environment and decreased team morale.
Her behavior was disruptive enough that the company decided to let her go to preserve the integrity and productivity of the workplace. Hearing this from someone who was there really reinforces my decision to terminate her employment at my company.
It seems her pattern of behavior has consistently caused problems wherever she goes, and I had to prioritize the well-being of my team. Thank you all for your continued support and understanding as I navigate this difficult situation.
Second Update: Spoke to My Parents About Her Actions
I wanted to share an update on the situation with my sister. I recently had a detailed conversation with my parents about the rumors she was spreading at work, especially regarding her substance use problems and our parents’ divorce. I explained how her behavior was disrupting the workplace and shared the specific complaints from employees who felt uncomfortable.
Additionally, I informed them about what a friend who still works at her previous company told me: that she was fired for orchestrating gossip and creating conflict among coworkers.
My parents are now very angry with her for sharing our family’s private matters and for causing turmoil in my company. They also apologized to me for not recognizing the severity of her actions sooner and for any additional stress this has caused our family.
Having their support has been a huge relief and reinforces that I made the right decision to prioritize my business and team. Thank you all for your continued support and understanding during this difficult time.
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's post:
LoopyMercutio
NTA- You didn’t choose “work over family” at all, she chose to divulge personal / private information that could damage your reputation, and your company’s reputation. You chose to get rid of a problematic employee. Period. And you did give her warning.
tlaloc995
Exactly this. I got my sister a job at at my place of employment (I'm a nurse, I recommended her for a unit secretary job. All her prior experience was working at McDonald's.
And they hired her) she did the exact same thing and destroyed the reputation I worked a decade to build. I now haven't spoken to her in a decade and it was the best decision I ever made to cut her off, she was an absolute boundary stomper. Good job and NTA.
BunnyBlushx
NTA. Your sister crossed serious boundaries, and work isn’t the place to air personal family drama. You gave her chances, but she didn’t respect your privacy or professionalism. You had to protect your company.
redditor_influencer (OP)
Thank you for your perspective. It’s been a really tough decision, and I appreciate your understanding. I do feel guilty about how things ended, but I felt I had to protect both my company’s integrity and my personal boundaries. It’s reassuring to know that others see where I’m coming from.
churchofdan
NTA You can't use your office for free therapy and expose the boss' family secrets and poison the culture of the office and expect to keep your job no matter who you're related to.
redditor_influencer (OP)
Thank you for your perspective. I hadn’t thought of it that way, but you’re right — it’s not fair to the team or the company to have personal matters aired out like that. I tried to handle it privately, but she didn’t seem to understand the professional boundaries.
BurdenedMind79
To be blunt, your sister should be glad you gave her a job in the first place. You didn't have to and you did. She should also be aware that if she shared personal stories about her CEO and they weren't her family, she wouldn't have got a second chance. she'd have been out the door in a shot.
I am kinda shocked that your parents are taking her side. Are they aware that she was discussing their personal lives with complete strangers? If so, I'd have really thought they would be more furious about it than you!
NTA. Your sister did this to herself. If she complains again, tell her that SHE was the one who put work before family by choosing to use your personal, family business as a way to make herself popular in the office. I bet there's a good reason she was chosen for redundancy when her previous company downsized.